Falling Up

impromptu goodbye

I hope this city crushes me under its weight. I just want to buried here under the rubble of the failure because that's the only place I feel like I belong. Under the memories of our something that we thought would last forever. Under the shattered bits of our glass sky.

A glass sky that broke open to reveal the vast nothingness that consumes me. An expanse that resembles my headspace more and more as I let this continue to consume me.

So many fragments of our city follow me home to remind me of what couldve been, and then my tears roll to form a vast sea in which I try to drown this feeling. But nothing can drown this. Nothing can help this fade from view.

Our glass sky fell into a glass wall, and that glass wall collapsed onto me. Leaving me with nothing but a heavy heart and bruises from building our world. But those wont fade either. They follow me with a determination, seemingly to remind me of where you went. Without me.

Im left to sit here, among this failure alone as you walk further and further away. And I feel that irresponsible happiness slip away with you. Your scent leaves me and it blends with the metallic scent of my blood that washed these streets red. You leave me alone among the city to find a new one to inhabit.

And all that's left is a ghost of your laugh, because I still remember how much it meant when I heard it through the broken speakers. Because even through the poor sound, I still smiled. Because that was another part of our city we built.

We built through laughs and tears, because, I at least, thought it meant something.

What hurts the most, isnt the weight crushing my chest and refusing to allow me to breathe. But that I can see you build a new city just across the horizon. A city that grows far past our own. A city I know you love more. A city with someone else.

And I know, this is probably my impromptu goodbye. Because secrets never last, and you seem to want to preserve that city alot more than sending postcards back to me.

So with a heavy heart, I listen as your laugh gets quieter, you scent disappears, and my irresponsible happiness follows you away from me as this city crushes me under it's weight.