City Of Dreams

Thirty-Three

Darren,

Hey, Love. I bet you're home from a show right now. I bet you expected me to be in the bedroom. I bet you expected to come home and sit on the couch with me. I bet you expected that we would live like this forever. I bet you expected you to make a pun and I hold my hands up and walk out. I bet you really wanted that. But maybe you're glad I'm gone. I'm sorry I couldn't be a good enough wife. I'm sorry you had to join the military to feel like you were a better husband. I'm sorry I had to leave you, but I don't know what's going to happen in the future and I don't want you to be put in harms way while it happens. Don't worry, there's hundreds more better girls that would kill to be with you. I hope you don't panic and try to find me like always. I hope you sigh and let it be. I hope you have a good life. I hope you find a new wife that gives you beautiful kids and a beautiful new place to live instead of that smelly old apartment that someone died in. I love you. I never will stop.
It's been a pleasure.

                                      Sincerely, Me.

______________________

Mitch and Angel,

I'm sorry. For everything. I'm sorry I didn't pay more attention to you after I got a part. I'm sorry I just left you. I have no words left. Words Fail huh? There's nothing I can say. I'm just sorry.

Sincerely, Me.

_______________________

Fellow Cast Members,

Thank you. For everything. It's been a dream come true for me to work with you. Hamilton was a real dream. Thank all of you. For all of the dreams come true. I wish you well for the future. Make sure to tell Ben Platt I said thanks for the hug.

Sincerely, Me.

_____________________

Wicked Crew,

Thank you for all the help and the rush of the few shows I was in. I can't stay in New York anymore. Details are not to be discussed right now, but now you have the opportunity to hire a better Elphaba. Huge thanks to Joy and Lucas for everything you did for me. I hope you will find someone better for the part. This was a dream come true but it can't stay that way anymore. I'm sorry. I quit.

                                   Sincerely, Me.
    PS please put in a word with the crew of Waitress for Addie Blue. She wants it so bad. She won't fail you like I did.

Thank you.
_______________________

David,

I have nothing to say. Thanks for all the laughs. Do something great in this world. Change it for the better. I believe in you.

I'm so sorry.

                              Sincerely, Me.

_______________________

Addie,

I was going to make a Dear Evan Hansen reference here, but you seem to be angry with me enough as it is. Where do I start? I'm sorry. I'm not really sure what to say. There's nothing I can say except sometimes you see everything you wanted and sometimes you see everything you wish you had and it's right there, right there, right there in front of you. And you want to believe it's true. So you make it true. And you think...maybe everybody wants it,needs it a little bit too. This was just a sad invention. It wasn't real. I know. But we were happy. I guess I couldn't let that go. I guess I couldn't give that up. I guess I wanted to believe cause if I just believe then I don't have to see what's really there. No, I'd rather pretend I'm something better than These broken parts, pretend I'm something other than This mess that I am Cause then I don't have to look at itAnd no one gets to look at it. No, no one can really see Cause I've learned to slam on the brake Before I even turn the key Before I make the mistake Before I lead with the worst of me I never let them see the worst of me Cause what if everyone saw? What if everyone knew? Would they like what they saw? Or would they hate it too? Will I just keep on running away from what's true?
All I ever do is runSo how do I step in Step into the sun? Step into the sun...ok so I lied. I am making a Dear Evan Hansen reference. Good song and it fits doesn't it? Have a good life. It sucks we had to stop being friends this way, but I won't stay here and risk it anymore. I can't. I hope you understand. And I hope you can forgive me. I wish you well for the future. Go knock em dead. I'll miss you, Addie Blue.

                                Sincerely, Me.