I know you're alone

35

When I woke up early in the morning, Harry sat naked up there at the railing and looked out over the sea. Yes, he was sitting on the floor. I crept up the stairs and I noted his wonderful body. The evening had ended wrong, but at the same time I didn't want to be the man who always said yes. Harry had many times got exactly what he wanted and just about to have a child wasn't just his decision. I sensed that he was disappointed, maybe sad. We had gone to the bed without directly talking about our problems. I had fallen asleep quickly, perhaps because of alcohol, or because I was tired after a long hard day?

"I confess my faults." I heard him say. Yes, Harry had noticed that I appeared. I chose to slip up and I decided to sit down next to him. I was naked, but I had a blanket around my body. I smiled at him.

"You have to learn that not everything should come at once?"

He nodded and smiled weakly. He looked at me. I noted that he had been crying, and he wasn't exactly that strong Harry as normal, for the moment.

"Niall, I know I'm doing things the wrong way and I think after I'm acting, but I really want to have everything with you."

I swallowed.

"I know." and I knew. "But we can't have children as if they were kittens?"

He nodded. He looked straight into my eyes and for the first time in a while he seemed to be himself. He was a quiet guy, my husband, and he sat there thinking normally.

"I want to be a teacher." he whispered, as he knew that was a part of our plan. "And we'll have the house to look like our house." He then tilted his head. "But can you promise me that in three years, when all this is as we want it to be, we'll look into the possibility of having children?"

I smiled and nodded. At last he understood what I wanted to do. I wanted to have everything ready before we took a big step like that.

"Yes, Harry. I promise with all my heart."

Harry took a deep breath and he seemed relieved. He raised his arm and put it around my shoulders.

"This wasn't the wedding night as I had planned."

I smiled big.

"I know."

He looked down at my lips and put on a wry smile.

"No, I must admit that even I have my limits, in a way? And It wont always become as I have planned?"

I nodded, and I agreed.

"And thank God for that. You need to calm down a bit..."

He laughed a little and I think he blushed.

"I have things to learn?" he whispered dully. "And thank you that  you opened up my eyes."

I smiled at him. His hand squeezed my shoulder and I felt relieved. This had been our first real fights, whatsoever. I quickly realized how often I had become quiet and I always let him be, and maybe I didn't directly told him about my own big point? Not until now and I had got Harry to understand.

"I love you." Harry whispered dark and he looked into my eyes. "Niall, you're the reason I even sit here today and try. You can't imagine how much difference there is between me before you and how I am today."

I swallowed.

"I can guess?"

He laughed and raised his eyebrows.

"Let's just say that I'm still not used to listening to others and I want to listen to you. I don't want to run over you, as I have done with the house and everything else. I'll start talking to you and plan together with you."