I know you're alone

55

Diana held my hand gently and we walked through the park to the swings. It was spring, and the sun shone in a cloudless sky. She was now five years old and I was so proud of her. Diana had got my blue eyes and her face reminded of me. Her hair was brown and long. Yes, she was my princess. She was my life, she was my everything. It was as if she was born just to make me realize what life was about. We stopped under that big tree, as always, and I looked out over the playground. Yes, I knew who could be there and I knew who I didn't want to meet. Harry hadn't contacted me in all these years, and I was happy about that, but he had the habit to look us up. I saw him in the end. He sat on a bench in the shade, and he looked at the children as was playing. I swallowed and I clenched my jaws. He had long dark hair down to his shoulders. Yes, he had long since stopped caring about himself. He had clothes that have seen better days and he looked generally tired. He seemed to still have that twinkle in his eye, but that was all.

"Diana, we'll go and buy ice cream instead?"

She frowned and looked up at me. Yes, I heard that disappointed breath.

"Is it such a day?"

I looked down at her and nodded.

"Yes, it's such a day."

She sighed a little. She was now used to that I in time and the dates chose not to implement what we had planned. I wanted to keep the distance to Harry and I couldn't be bothered with all the questions that would come up, if I let her meet him. We hadn't a single photo of Harry in the house. No, Diana didn't even know he existed. For her, she was my creation from a surrogate mother. That was all.

We turned around and walked back toward the entrance of the park. Diana sighed a little, but she was brought up, and she knew that it was me who decided everything. We had rules, and she knew why. I wanted to be a good dad and make sure she never got in trouble. I was the one as had complete control over my daughter and she was used to it.

"On another day?"

I smiled at her.

"Yes, we can play in the park another day."

She sighed and looked up at me.

"Daddy, can I get chocolate ice cream?"

I laughed a little and nodded at her.

"Yes, you get exactly what you want, princess."

She become happy and I saw the smile that appeared on her lips. I saw how happy she was by just such a simple thing, that she got to choose ice cream.

****

I came into the store, in time. Yes, I had changed jobs and of course, I was manager of a supermarket. I had somehow got a good life and I had what I needed. Diana and I moved from the house, and instead, we lived in a smaller house, a good distance away from my old life. We had begun to become what we wanted to be and, I was a new man. No one knew that I was gay and I didn't want to take in a new man in Diana's life. No, I chose to totally live my life for her. Thanks to her, I found a meaning to everything.

"There was a man here who searched for you."

I spun around and met Kim's gaze. She was my right hand, and she helped me with everything. I swallowed.

"Yes? Who?"

She pondered.

"I think his name was Harry. He was tall, had long dark hair and he was wearing odd clothes."

I took a deep breath.

"If you see him again, tell him I don't want to talk to him. It's a long story."