A Chain Reaction; Moons on the Twist

7. Titanium

Titanium

“Have you decided about the date?” Pring's dad looked at Pring and then shifted his gaze to me. I looked down at my plate.
“We’re thinking about an August wedding.” Pring replied looking at her mom. When was she going to tell me that? She obviously didn’t discuss it with me.
“Hmm…. Good good.” Dad went back to eating.
“We have six months to plan.” Mom smiled sweetly at Pring. “Pha, I know you’re busy. But we would like your opinion on everything.” I looked up at them somewhat alarmed. Dad gave me a sympathetic look. He must have remembered his own wedding.
“Don’t worry Pha, I’ll send photos for your approval. That way you won’t have to miss your work.” Pring patted my hand noticing my face. I sighed. I don’t know shit about flowers, dresses or colors. I can approve anything she sends me as long as she doesn’t expect my opinion.
So it’s really going to happen? I won’t be a free man in six months. I don’t know how to fathom this nor what to feel.
I didn’t actually date Pring back in University. We were kind of friends with benefits. In reality I didn’t want a commitment. I slept around a lot. Please don’t judge me, but what do you think a man was supposed to do when women threw themselves at me from right and left? Pring was just one of them. She’s given me many non so subtle hints that she would like to go exclusive with me but I wasn’t interested.
During the final year of our internship, I was so busy I didn’t have time to fool around. So Pring I became a couple. She has become a habit to me. She was always there and we fell into a rhythm. Four months ago pushed by both our parents, we got engaged.
I knew that I’d have to marry sooner or later, since I’m twenty five. Isn’t it better that I’m getting married to my friend, someone I knew for years and she’s not bad in bed too. And a real hot woman, so why not her?
It didn’t bother me much that I don’t love her in that crazy, heart shattering way. I don’t get butterflies in my stomach when I see her. Those things only exist in movies. There’s nothing called love in real world.
Oh so I thought.
I remember coming home after Wayo’s appointment and digging around my old boxes looking for the note he wrote for me. It was carefully placed between withered pages of my old journal. I read the words crawled on it with an awkward hand writing.

To - P'Pha

You're the best for me.
Always and forever.

From - Wayo

How long has it been? Seven years?
How hard did we look for him that day? I didn’t know why he ran away from me. Kit and Beam even looked for that tall Nong, Ming. But nobody knew what happened to them on that day.
I’ve been following that kid since he was an awkward kid in glasses and braces. I thought it was only me. But to know that he felt the same and loose him all the same?
I was out of my mind for many months after that incident. First I felt regret for all the wasted moments we could have had in school. Then I felt sad for letting him slip through my fingers. Finally it was anger.
I was fine before learning about his feelings. Why did he have to ruin me? Why did he write that letter if didn’t want me? I was lost.
Then I became cold. Coder than normal. I closed off my heart, banning from anyone entering. I focused on work and work alone. I became titanium.
Or am I?
Ever since that pink haired youth came to my examination room, my life hasn’t been the same. Many questions danced in and out of my overwhelming brain.
How does he feel about me? Has his feelings changed since highschool? Of course he must have million admirers now. With those looks, he must get lots of invitations from both genders.
“So I have been considering between a beach wedding or out door wedding.” Pring slipped her hand through my arm and looked up. I had been zoning out from the conversation. “What do you think?” Well, what do I think? Does it matter?
“Mmmmm… beach?” I just picked one from the two.
“Yeah I like that too” she started prattling on more. It’s past three in the afternoon. How soon would I be free of her? I want to excuse and go home. I need to rejuvenate before starting the new week.

I wasn’t sure that I was eager to meet Wayo again. But when his appointment day neared, I got impatient. It’s not that I was expecting anything. I just wanted make sure he’s real. Of course I know he’s real. I confirmed things with asshole Kit.
I was already in my usual examination room by ten thirty. I was shifting around in my chair, bouncing  my feet. I kept looking at the door, when a soft nock came from the door, I jumped a little.
I went to the door and opened it instead of calling to come in. He was standing there alone today. A black hoodie covered his head. He looked up lowering the hood. I stared down at his hair now dyed Ash blonde. I didn’t know I was staring until he coughed a little.

“Sorry, come in.” I mumbled.
He moved in meekly.
“Your hair…” I pointed his head and smiled. He ran his fingers through his strands and smiled back bashfully.
“I have to do what they tell me.” He said softly and went to sit in the chair. He must mean his management. His limp is less pronounced now.
I went around him to sit in front of him. He was wearing dark shorts today. I bit back a laugh remembering our last encounter. He placed a folder on my table.
“Test results” he said laying back on the chair.
I examined the X-ray and  scan reports. They didn’t look as good as I wanted but not really bad. With proper exercises  and medication he might be able to recover without surgery.
He was staring at me with anticipation. Poor boy is scared.
“Where’s your friend today?” I asked standing up and pointing the examination table. He slowly stood up and walked behind the curtained area. I picked up the massage gel jar I brought specially for him and went in. He was already lying down.
“He is busy today.” He mumbled with his eyes closed. I stared at his face. His long curling eyelashes brushed tops on his pink tinged cheeks. I never got to look at him this close while in school. And I never knew he was gorgeous like this.
“So you’re all alone?” I started removing velco straps from his knee brace. His swelling and redness has reduced.
“A company driver drove me. He’s waiting at the car park.” I poured a little massage oil to my palm and started rubbing his knee in circular motions. He jumped slightly and opened his eyes at my touch.
It wasn’t actually my job to exercise and massage his knee. Technically, I should direct him to a physiotherapist. But I don’t think it’s possible for him, under the circumstances.
I glanced at his face. There’s a blissful look on his face.
“How do you feel?” I asked.
“It feels great P… I’m sorry. It’s nice doctor.” He looked at me eyes opened wide.
“Call me P’Pha.  Myfrom old school after all.” He stared dumbfounded. I chuckled. I must have been little stiff last time we met. That’s my nature though. He blushed a little at my words. By this time I was simply stroking his knee.
Remembering my place, I started bandaging his knee. When I’m done I put the brace back on his knee and strapped in.
“Get this medication from a pharmacy.” I wrote him a prescription when we were sitting facing each other. He nodded and took it.
“How is it? My knee?” He asked. He looked scared.
“With proper exercises and massages, I think you can recover without a surgery.” I smiled looking up.
“Surgery?” He squeaked.
“Hey, I said you’ll be fine na?” I touched his forearm gently. “We’ll cross that bridge if we get there, okay?” I gave a pat to his arm and took my hand away. He nodded and sniffed. I wanted to tousle his hair or pinch his cheeks. But I didn’t.
“Massage your knee every night and apply this serum and bandage.” I handed him a bag. He looked at me curiously. “I bought it in advance for you. Here, take this.” Placed the bag on his lap.
“Thank you P” He said respectfully and stood up. On second thoughts I stood up too.
“I'll come with you to the car park.” He stopped at the door.
“It’s alright P, I can go alone.” He mumbled, blushing again. It seems he blushes so easily.
“No, it’s late.” Placed my palm on his back and urged him to move forward. “Let’s go.”