All The Hurt Would Go Away

A man who can't love...

"Hey, uh, are you by yourself?

...I don't know what to do about Jon

...He's emotionally fine I guess

...His memory, it's - fragmented

...What I mean is he thought I left him the way his father did and he thought Andy was his only friend in hospital

...He's asleep right now yeah

...I can't keep him in lockdown like I did!

...No, then I don't know where he is!

...Okay I'll think about it today and call you back

...Bye"
"Who was that?"
"A friend. Do you want breakfast?"
I frowned at the vague answer but couldn't resist food.
"Porridge? Cereal? Toast?"
"Toast."
I took my own two slices of bread putting them in the toaster as Lin shrugged and picked up the cereal box.
"Who was on the phone?"
"None of your concern"
"I heard my name"
"Just leave it"
"Then will you at least say what happened to me?"
"Not yet"
He sighed.
"When will I actually find out about my own life? I obviously got past it since I'm still alive now so what's the point of keeping it from me?"
"Jon."
"What now?"
"Did Andy get you to do anything in the coma?"
"Well, I opened the wounds on my arms but that was only to prove I was strong."
"To him?"
"No, I mean, he was the only person there"
Lin gave me a pointed look.
"I thought he was the only person there"
"You don't remember what caused the scratches I presume?"
I shook my head.
"Andy. He caused them. Did you have a dry throat? Legs shaking?"
"...So what?"
"When you came to me after what happened you were the exact same. I took care of you from Andy, you have to realise that. This good side in your head was just a hallucination. No matter how long it takes you to come to terms with it you have to realise Andrew is and was the bad guy."
I'm sick of Lin telling me who's good and who's bad without letting me know who even did what, it's unfair on my part and Andy's.
"How is he the bad guy if you won't even tell me what he did? For all I know he could of done something amazing that you wish you'd done for me."
"Just... trust me."
"How am I supposed to trust you if I didn't see you while I was at hospital?"
"You're trying to provoke me on purpose Jon. Quit it."
"No! I only saw Andy there and although I proved I was strong how would I know if he caused anything when he clearly didn't seem like it and all I remember of you is apparently my father's life story? You've got to realise it makes no sense to just accuse this guy who was there for me of doing something terrible you won't even tell me! For all I know you probably haven't come up with the terrible thing yet and you just need a bright idea!"
Lin got up and stormed out of the house slamming the door shut behind him. Maybe I went off on a tangent but I did have a point, the longer I don't know the less I'll believe it. Not to mention it was singularly annoying that I couldn't remember a thing. My phone started vibrating with some sort of unknown number, interested I answered the call:
"Hello Jon"
"Who is this?"
"Are you out of hospital?"
"Yes. Why? Who are you?"
"I'm your friend."
"Who are you?"
"Andy, Andrew Rannells if you want the long name."
"My friend says you aren't a good person"
"Did he say why?"
"Not exactly"
"Than who do you believe?"
"I don't know who to believe anymore."
"Did he say I did anything to you?"
"Yes, but he won't tell me anything about it. You seem nice so he could've made it up."
A long silence fell on the receiving end before a throaty whisper came through.
"...Probably."
I quickly ended the call hearing the front door open again.
"Jon?"
I turned to Lin raising my eyebrows.
"Okay, I'm really sorry. I shouldn't of got in a bad mood without thinking about your position in all of this. I was wrong."
"So, you're not mad anymore?"
"No."
"Is this story you won't tell me made up or real?"
"Real. Sadly real."
"Why won't you tell me?"
"I don't think you're ready yet, it had negative effects after it happened, three years later and I'm scared it will now."
"Why exactly three years?"
"That's part of it"
I sighed, I wasn't going to get anywhere with this.
"Andy called."
Lin's entire body froze as he tensed.
"When."
"Just before you came in."
"Did he say anything?"
"Just his name."
"And?"
"He asked if I remembered him, I said no, he asked if I was out of hospital yet, I said yes -"
"-We've got to get you out of here."
"What?"
I looked over at him to see his entire face had gone pale.
"You're not safe. Not anymore. I'll call one of my friends to look after you for a bit."
"Do I get a say in this?"
"No, not really, sorry about that."
I rolled my eyes as he grabbed the phone and scrolled through his contacts.
"Daveed would probably be the most okay with it. I'll go call him, don't leave the house, don't go near a window, stay within sight. Okay?"
"Jeez okay you are a drama queen aren't you?"
I stood in the middle of the room waiting until the call finished.
"Right, he's coming to pick you up. Pack your stuff. I've gotta stay here in case Andy comes."
"He seemed nice over the phone -"
"-A lot of people seem nice."
I shrugged it off going into my room to pack. It didn't make sense for me to just get tossed from house to house without a say, I can't even remember what caused this to even begin. I heard the door to Lin's study click shut and some sort of object hit the window, I peered through to see Andy waving at me. Carefully unlocking the front door I walked out with my things.
"Hello Jon!"
"Hey, I'm just about to move houses."
"Where to?"
"This guy, Daveed, I think he was in Hamilton but I can't remember to be honest."
"So you're about to live with a guy you don't know?"
"Pretty much."
"Why not Lin's?"
"He's scared of you."
Andy chuckled to himself and my arms clenched, I didn't know why so quickly relaxed before he realised.
"Wouldn't it be better if you lived with me? I'll call Lin after to settle it. I'd rather you actually know your housemate than go with a stranger."
"But Lin -"
"I'll sort it out. Is that all your stuff?"
I nodded hesitantly.
"Well we need to go shopping, ready?"
I briefly went over everything Lin had told me about this man shortly realising it wasn't much at all apart from the fact he's 'bad' but even that has no proof. Taking a deep breath in I confirmed it to myself.
"Ready."