All The Hurt Would Go Away

The best man I have ever known...

I woke up with Andrew beside me and the light shining from the edges of the blinds, Andrew was sound asleep so I debated whether I should fall back asleep or try to leave the bed. Deciding on the latter I wanted to make breakfast. I gently removed by arms from beside him and edged slowly out of the bed placing the duvet back where it was, I could have written a note but I wanted to wake him up with the smell of food. I know for a fact that is the best way to wake up. Once in the kitchen I found enough food to make a decent hot breakfast. I fried two eggs, warmed up baked beans and cooked the bacon. Surely enough, Andrew walked downstairs as the bacon sizzled in the pan.
"Wha-Jon? You didn't have to do this for me"
"I know, but since I woke up first I thought I'd make something."
He cuddled me from behind as I moved the bacon around in the pan.
"I've only got a few hours left with you, this has gone way to quickly"
I smiled to myself
"Guess we're gonna savour the time we have left."
"Every minute"
He whispered in my ear causing my insides to go wild. Immediately after he went to make us both a coffee.
"Milk?"
"Uh yes please."
"Sugar?"
"Yes."
"Sure sweetie."
I rolled my eyes at his pun and began to dish up our breakfast.
"Should I take the coffee in?"
He yawned and I nodded in response following after him with both our plates.
"Lovely, thanks Jon."
"No problem."
"You do know our waiting idea starts now."
"Hmm?"
"For this meal you have to wait ten minutes before washing up. Remember?"
I groaned
"Yes. Do we have to? I made you breakfast and everything!"
"I did say that you didn't have to make it. I was more than capable."
"I wanted to surprise you..."
He caught on to my hesitation and quickly caught himself saying
"And it was a lovely surprise, waking up to the smell of bacon was a lovely way to start the day off so thank you."
I smiled and he continued
"However, it doesn't change the fact we're sticking to the plan. Otherwise we'll keep putting it off and you'll never get this habit sorted out."
"Can't we start next time I visit? It was so much fun that I don't want to end it in this way, besides, it won't help when I'm at Lin's anyway so why bother?"
"Because I care about you, I trust you to try and push yourself when I'm not there. I want you to get past this. I want to be able to celebrate with you afterwards knowing that I helped you. Not hindered. I want to be a part of your life whether it be an acquaintance or anything more if I'm lucky. Okay?"
He gave my hand a tight squeeze and I nodded
"Okay."
"Good, right lets get started on this tasty breakfast right here!"
I laughed at his enthusiasm and we both tucked in to our separate meals occasionally stealing glances at each other.
"Interesting choice for a breakfast, why didn't you just make cereal?"
"I wanted to wake you up with the smell of cooked food since it's such a good smell."
He smiled
"And why this kind gesture?"
"Because you were so kind yesterday, you are helping me with this habit and you accepted me in general and -"
"- Hey I don't need a summary"
He chuckled as I smiled nervously
"But, it means a lot, just small stuff like this. It's comforting to know you still care."
He reached over and held my hand offering me a smile which I returned. All that I was thinking about though was the fact I'd have to wait ten minutes before washing up. I was worried of whether I would last that long and already wanted to snatch Andrew's empty plate from him now, I knew it'd be hard but not this hard.
"Jon, what's on your mind?"
"Hmmm?"
"You've been staring at my plate for ages. I have a pretty good idea of what you're thinking about but I need you to clarify."
He looked into my eyes and I sighed,
"Washing up..."
"Thought so. Come on then, the quicker the wait starts the quicker it's over with."
He gathered the empty plates taking them to the sink and shortly returned with a couple of travel magazines.
"So, the next time you come round I want to have a day out with you, like an epic day out. So, why don't we pick somewhere to go? There's a day long trip to the Grand Canyon? Or a day in Washington DC?"
He dropped the magazines onto the table and I started to flip through one, it kind of helped as a distraction but I couldn't resist the tiny voice in my head urging me to go the kitchen. The images all looked like great fun but, as much as I didn't want to admit it, I was nervous that if something happened I'd be miles away from anyone. We'd be trapped together. Perhaps I could just not see him alone till I'm certain? Or would he get suspicious?
"What are you thinking?"
"Hmm?"
"Jon, the page you're looking at is a makeup advert, I don't mind if you would like it but I doubt that was your intention. Very much."
I noticed and put the magazine back in the table quickly, my eyes flitting between the clock and the magazine. Only six minutes had passed, I never had realised how long ten minutes was until now. I heard Andrew audibly sigh sitting next to me.
"I want to help you Jon, but now I'm wondering if this is just bringing us apart. I'm not forcing you to wait, I hope you do realise that. You can go wash up if you want to, I want to help you past it but not if it ruins our day together."
I nodded and he looked at the clock.
"You can wash up early, Lin's gonna pick you up any minute now, I hate to leave this on such a bad note but, think about it okay?"
He shot me a half smile and I smiled back before rushing to the kitchen.