All The Hurt Would Go Away

Don't let me make the same mistake...

Lin was back in his study as I finished the washing up, even though I was all sleepy after watching a movie in a pillow fort and duvet hoodie I still had to act like it was the afternoon and I wasn't tired. There was a fat chance of me telling Lin exactly what me and Andrew did since it was private, not in a weird way but I don't want Lin to be piggy backing all over my love life, no thanks. I splashed some water in my face to wake me up then went to play with the kids, after a while they began to get bored of dolls and cars so I had to call on Lin.
"Hey, got any more stuff for the kids to do?"
I watched as Lin stopped writing
"Uh grab some pens and paper let'em draw for a bit."
"Got it. Are you okay?"
He tensed in his seat, with his back to me I couldn't tell his facial expression but judging by the ink blots on his paper he was mad about something.
"Writer's block. I'll get over it."
"Maybe I can help."
"What rhymes with candid?"
"Rancid? Ranted? Planted?"
"Rancid! Cheers."
"No problem."
I smiled to myself closing the door, happy that I could help even though I had no idea as to what Lin was writing about. Handing the kids pens and paper I decided to try teach them a bit on how to write as a little head start during school.
"So there's an l. That's just a line with a flick at the bottom. Try it."
I drew an l and they copied, vaguely looking similar I pressed on.
"Then there's an i, that's a line with a dot."
They both drew the line, then a massive squiggle at the top. Proud of my efforts nonetheless I left them to draw.
"Lin?"
"Yeah?"
"Can I take a nap? I'm tired after Ariella's nightmare talk."
"Sure. I'll wake you up for dinner if need be."
I walked upstairs to the guest room where I was staying, I simply collapsed onto the bed and tried to sleep although I shortly figured it was pretty damn hard. Getting out my phone I started texting Andrew.
Me:
Hey, I'm supposed
to be napping but
I can't sleep. Help.

Andrew:
Count sheep.

Me:
Omg it worked!

Andrew:
Wow. At least I can
say I tried. You're
just too sarcastic.

Me:
I had no idea.

Andrew:
Well, if it's like that
then I'll stop texting
you hmm?

Me:
Sorry.

Andrew:
Thought so. What
do you wanna talk
about then?

Me:
Arrange next time
I can see you? The
kids are exhausting
to look after.

Andrew:
Aww hope they don't
put you off having
your own xxx

Me:
U wanna have kids
with me?

Andrew:
Calm down, I just
think you'd be a great
father 😂😂

Me:
Sorry for jumping
to conclusions xx

Andrew:
You're just as nervous
texting me as when you
are with me. I'm flattered
I have such a big effect
on you 😉❤️ Why don't
we talk about that?

Me:
Oh my god. I'm
counting sheep
now goodbye.

I shut off my phone before I could see his reply. My cheeks were bright red and I was breathing heavily, Jesus what this man does to me is crazy. Pulling the covers above my head I tried to block out the light but failed, I just got warmer beneath the duvet and it did not help at all. Giving up eventually I went downstairs and Lin smiled gratefully, I looked at what the kids were doing yet to see Ariella drawing a mother like figure in their family again.
"Lin, go take a nap or something. Whatever you do don't go to the study."
He smiled patting me on my shoulder as he walked out of the room and I heard his footsteps as he went up the staircase.
"Ariella?"
She looked up at me
"Who's that?"
I pointed to the mother figure
"Mummy!"
"But mummy's in the sky remember?"
She frowned
"When you talk about mummy it makes daddy sad. He misses her too and when you talk about her, he thinks of when she went"
"Went where?"
I paused
"In the sky"
"Will she come back?"
I sighed
"No, that's why daddy misses her so much. Why don't you go upstairs and give daddy a big hug yeah? Also can you promise me to not talk about mummy for a bit?"
She held up her pinky and I willingly interlocked my pinky finger with hers. She then ran past me and started to go upstairs.
"So who's our mummy?"
I turned to see Isaac looking at me
"You just have daddy for now, and me, but I'm the uncle."
He thought for a moment then nodded to himself and continued playing to my relief. Lin then came downstairs holding Ariella in his arms with tears in his eyes.
"Why are you crying?"
"Happy tears."
Ariella nodded then he put her down to go play.
"Thank you Jon."
"No problem."
"I mean it, thanks for telling them for me, otherwise I would have never told them and I'd just suffer in silence."
"That's why you got me."
I laughed pulling him into a hug to which he returned
"By the way, while you were napping I had a coffee so..."
I immediately went to the kitchen to wash up with a smile on my face, Lin followed me into the room.
"Did you actually fall asleep at all when you were upstairs?"
I looked at Lin confused and he held up my phone to see the text message Andrew left me which I didn't look at out of embarrassment.
"So what? I texted him for a bit."
Lin raised an eyebrow
"I couldn't sleep alright? Now let me wash up."
He laughed grabbing a dishcloth to dry up afterwards but paused and raised a hand to his mouth in mock surprise.
"Oh no! I wonder where the fairy liquid has gone? Who could ever do such a thing as hide your aesthetic from you?"
I turned around to glare at Lin
"Whoops someone's getting cranky!"
"Lin. Where is it."
"I dunno."
"You clearly do know otherwise it would still be in the kitchen."
"Maybe it still is in the kitchen?"
"Linnnnnnnnnnn........"
"What?"
"Maybe I'll just go over to Andrew's and wash up his stuff, you can do your own!"
"Bit late for Andrew's, staying the night?"
He asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Maybe just for dinner."
"Right then I'll see you in an hour."
Lin said in the most sarcastic tone possible.
"Come on just find the fairy liquid. It's a little quest!"
"Maybe in the morning after my second coffee, gotta wait till then."
"Shame the dirty dishes will just pile up in this house..."
"Eww! No! I'm not staying! I'm going upstairs to pack for the night!"
Lin burst out laughing as I ran out the room. I cannot stand dirty dishes left uncatered to, and being unable to do anything? Fat chance I'd push myself through that torture! I returned downstairs having texted Andrew and went to say goodnight to the kids and Lin.
"You are such a germaphobe when it comes to washing up!"
He laughed as I stuck out my tongue then told the kids to never do that to anyone their age to help Lin out of parent fights. A knock sounded at the door. I quickly opened it and moved to leave the house
"Hey babe!"
"Hey are we off?"
"Hold on, I wanted to see what made you suddenly choose to not stay the night here."
I started to get embarrassed.
"It's really nothing I just wanted a change of scenery, you really don't have to -"
"Come on Jon, let Andrew see! Be nice to the guest."
Lin chastised as I glared at him, he smiled back innocently ushering the kids back into the living room. Shortly after he returned to take Andrew to the kitchen with me tagging behind
"So, have you noticed Jon's OCD about washing up?"
Andrew turned to look at me questioningly as I turned away.
"Indeed, what is the problem?"
"I decided to test it, so I hid the fairy liquid. He's refusing to find it and is unwilling to watch as the dirty dishes pile up. So he wants to sleep round yours."
Andrew laughed as I stood there, enraged at Lin for ridiculing me in front of him. I decided to act as if I wasn't planning to rip Lin's head off and meekly said
"So can I stay?"
He smiled warmly at me
"Sure baby, is everything packed?"
I nodded
"Put it all in the car then, I just need to talk with Lin."
I nodded eyeing Lin who looked just as surprised as I am. Walking out the room I quickly put the stuff in the car then came back to listen to the conversation.
"I know I fucked up..."
"It's hard enough to be comfortable with you and Jon, let alone what you did to Stacy. Tell me now, do you intend to stay with Jon? For real?"
"I really think this is it. I promise I won't... you know. If so I will leave and never bother you two again"
"Make sure he calls me at some point tonight. That's all. Go."
"Thank you so much"
I sprinted out the door and to the car, just getting in as Andrew left the front door, shortly getting into the driver's seat.
"Did it take you that long to put the stuff in the car?"
He chuckled
"I was just getting some air into the car so shush."
He went silent for a bit.
"Do you drive Jon?"
"Hmm?"
"Have you learnt how to drive?"
"I haven't driven a car for years apparently."
"You've...?"
"Forgotten? Yeah."
The drive was silent for a bit
"Do you want to learn again?"
"I'm not sure, I don't know if I trust myself with all the controls."
"It seems like a lot but it isn't really. One day I'll come with you to learn, how about that?"
"One day."
I affirmed, meaning I did not want it to be soon at all. Andrew parked the car in the driveway and pulled out the keys.
"Right then, guess you're the lodger for tonight!"
I laughed watching as he got out my bags from the boot and carried them to the door for me. Smiling to myself I got out of the car closing the door shut behind me. I really hope this actually goes well, I don't think I can bear to watch everything crash down again.