B a B y

Struggles

A/N: Hey, I'm fucking drained from depression. And sleeping isn't helping with all the flip-flop nightmares I have. Oh, plus me waking up and literally having to cry myself back to sleep.

Whatever. No one gives no shits anymore. Hell, the whole world has depression and I'm just some fucking dumbass 14 yr old wanting the world to hear my feelings. But no one cares so enjoy this fucking chapter I took out of my depressing hours to write for you.

John's P.O.V

"Taffy," I called. I was in the bathroom looking in the mirror. "I'm here what is it Mon Amour?" I faced him and lifted my shirt. "D-do my breast  look bigger?" I asked scared out of my mind.

"A bit, have you stopped taking your testosterone? " He asked, I nodded sheepishly. "Why?" he asked in a concerned tone. "I only stopped because, uh last time we had sex, and I took the pills right I became extremely nauseous," I explained, I watched as the color began to drain from him. "D-Did you happen to get your period?" I shook my head 'no'. It was supposed to com the day after we had sex, always on the 1st.

"How many days did you miss?" he asked, his accent was very thick, almost inaudible, it only happened when he was guilty. "A week," he mumbled French swear words. "What's wrong?" I asked. "Um, nothing, just follow me. Okay?" I nodded and followed him into the bedroom bathroom. He pulled out a box and handed me a pregnancy test...I looked at him and he nodded leaving the bathroom.

-

I swung the door open, more than upset. I'm furious I threw the positive pregnancy test in his direction in pure anger. "Fuck you." I spat coldly glaring at him. "John, calm down," he said standing up and looking at the test. "Did you lie about being on birth control?" he asked gripping the test in his hand. "Hold the fuck up buddy, don't blame this shit on me! I specifically told you I was not on my birth control, buy you being the horny bastard you are completely ignored me!" I yelled. He didn't say anything, he just stared at the test. 

"We aren't ready for a child..." he mumbled.

"I fucking hate you," I sobbed. "I'm sorry!" he yelled. "You don't know how sorry I am...!" he exclaimed coming closer to me.

"We aren't even adults Laf! We're only 18 goddammit! Still in college! And here we are bringing a helpless baby into the world! Our lives for fuck sakes!" I exclaimed. 

"...Does that me your getting an abortion?" He asked pulling me closer into his arms. I balled his shirt up into my fist the thought of getting an abortion making it worse, him even thinking that way making me regret our relationship. "No, why would even think that. I'm cruel when I need to be but I'm not a fucking heartless monster..." I said pushing him away. 

"I'm sorry," he said once more, he walked over to me and kissed my head. "I'm sorry, for yelling at you...I'm just scared. Pregnancy can be noticed in an instant. What do I do Laf? What do I tell my parents?" I asked looking up into his chocolate eyes.

"It won't be long until your body changes. Let's just stick to loose clothing for right now, and not post or tell anymore until we- you're comfortable with sharing. But we have to tell your parents today. We'll tell them when they come over for dinner okay?" He said, picking me up and lying me down on our shared bed, in our down. I nodded into his chest.

"Sleep, princess your tired and you need rest. I nodded again closing my eyes letting sleep consume me.