Perseverance (The Resident FF) by Frances51163

CHAPTER SIXTY-NINE: Melancholy Descends

Returning to work the next day Conrad once again immersed himself in helping patients and refused to talk about the dramatic events of the previous day. Mike had been rebuffed when he offered to visit the young man that night with a polite but adamant 'no thanks". Devons' suggestion of going for drinks was also declined. Leaving Chastain at the end of his shift the fair haired man was relieved when he didn't meet any of his well intentioned friends. He knew he was lucky to have people concerned about him and didn't take it for granted but Conrad was used to dealing with his hurt in private, physical or otherwise. Lately his friends seemed intent on breaching that safe zone he had built for himself. He didn't understand why all of a sudden it was considered wrong for him to want some time by himself. He had always known solitude as a child so when he became an adult it was something he prized. His eye problem had taught him pain but also perseverance. Rubbing his eyes now as he appreciated they were still dying down from the bad episode he went through the night before he unlocked his bike opting to walk rather than cycle home. He had made it to the street before someone called his name. Sighing he turned to look at the Actor.

"What do you want?"
"Was wondering if you were free for a drink?" Hills grinned charmingly and the Resident could understand his popularity.
"Told you to ring me tomorrow."
"Well I kinda figured you were going to brush me off."
"Look it's been a long day," Conrad started walking again not bothering to deny the other mans' assumption.
"Just one beer?"
"You're persistent," Conrad admitted after a few moments, "okay but we go to my place."
"Great!" Hills beamed.
"Damn," Conrad shook his head knowing that was what the young man had been hoping for.
"Hey I'm good company."
"If you say so."
"So how come you visited Savannah?"
"I grew up there."
"Lucky guy. It's a beautiful place."
"Can't disagree," Conrad concurred as they stopped at traffic lights waiting for the pedestrian green light, "how about you?"
"I'm from New York."
"The Big Apple."
"Nowhere else is like it."
"But you obviously travel for your work," Conrad noted as the green finally shone and they crossed in front of the traffic.
"Yeah but New York will always be home," Hills waved to a girl who was filming them with her mobile from a passenger seat, "smile for the lady."
"Hell," Conrad ducked his head and quickened his steps.
"Sorry. I don't take much notice of being under scrutiny," the Actor apologised once they reached the pavement and his fan had passed by.
"Must be like living in a goldfish bowl."
"I'm used to it. Guess it's the price of fame."
"And you wanted to be famous?" Conrad wondered curiously.
"I wanted to be a successful Actor and if I'm honest the thought of having fans was a great appeal but the reality of those two things is different to what I thought."
"So you regret your dream?" Conrad nodded towards the steps of his apartment block and led the way up.
"I regret many things but not becoming an Actor," Hills offered honestly as they stepped into the elevator.
"Guess there's no such thing as the perfect job."
"No but the good things outweigh the bad in my profession and I'm sure it's the same in yours."
"Definitely."
"So when did you decide to become a Doctor? I mean how old were you when you realized what you wanted to do with your life?"
"I feel like I'm being interviewed," Conrad complained as the elevator chimed and he led the way along the hallway.
"Sorry. My brother always says I'm inquisitive enough to be a Reporter."
"He's right," Conrad affirmed ruefully as he fished out his keys, wondering if he had made a mistake in bringing the Actor home.

Fifty minutes later Conrad glanced across the kitchen counter at the Actor as he put down his second empty beer bottle.

"Think it's time for you to go."
"You never answered my question."
"Which one?" Conrad demanded for answering questions seemed like all he had been doing since their arrival.
"When did you know what you wanted to do?"
"Guess when I was a kid I worked out Doctors could help people in pain."
"But was there something specific which prompted you?" the dark haired man persisted ashe twirled the remains of his beer.
"Not really," Conrad rose wanting to end the conversation, no way was he going to relate his personal experiences with pain and agony, "like I said it's time for you to go."
"Sure man," Hills stood up quickly looking flustered, "didn't mean to pry so much."
"Yes you did," Conrad challenged as he handed over the other mans' jacket, "you like researching roles, I get it but that doesn't mean you have full access to my life."
"Didn't realize that was what I was doing, research," Hills confessed, "guess I just like being thorough."
"Nothing wrong if you want to be thorough just keep me out of your stories," the Resident led the way over to the door and opened it before offering his hand.
"Thanks Conrad. I've learnt a lot," Hills noted as he shook hands before putting on his jacket, "so you free tomorrow?"
"Tomorrow?"
"Yeah you said you were off. Thought you might like to visit the set and find out what we do."
"I thought ye were shooting in Savannah?"
"We do but we also have a studio here in Atlanta. You're welcome to come down any time."
"Thanks but no thanks."
"Well the offer is there any time," the Actor explained easily as he handed over a card, "give me a shout if you change your mind."
"I won't," Conrad shook his head in exasperation as he accepted the card and watched the man walking away.

Although Conrad had found himself answering many questions from the Actor about his work he was glad he had been able to steer the conversation away from his childhood. Retrieving a cold facecloth from the fridge he walked over and sank down into the leather couch in relief, happy to be alone finally. Pressing the cold material to his eyes he thought back to his burgeoning idea of becoming a Doctor. That dream had its' roots in the hours and days of excruciating pain when no relief was to hand and despair seemed to blossom. He had learned the hard way a kind word or understanding companion was beyond price. He had learnt that harsh truth because growing up he was by himself when he dealt with the agonizing pain that represented his eye problem and often times he had considered ending things, simply to escape the pain. He knew his friends cared about him but they didn't understand that their acts of kindness just reinforced his feelings of worthlessness. If he had been worth the effort his father would have held him when there was no remedy rather than locking him up! Of course even thinking that he knew was wrong. Well his head knew ..... his heart was another thing. He sighed. He wasn't usually so melancholic. He blamed it on the accumulation of the past few months and resolved that he would quit feeling sorry for himself ..... tomorrow.

tbc