Perseverance (The Resident FF) by Frances51163

CHAPTER ONE HUNDRED: Fear

Jude looked at his companion in the dim lit room relieved he was going to talk but dreading what he was about to be told .....

The young boy sat on his bed debating if he should chance a trip downstairs.  Closing the book he had been reading he considered if now was a good time to get something to eat.  If his father was leaving for a night meeting he usually left before eight but it was quarter before nine now and the car still sat outside which signalled he probably wasn't going out that night.  He was grateful Tom had shown him how to read a clock.  Alicia had given him a special present the morning she left, a Superman alarm clock which now sat on his bedside locker beside the Superman lamp.   Tom and Alicia had taken him shopping a few weeks ago to get some new stuff for his room.  The pair had told him his father had given permission for them to decorate his room any way he would like but the child had not believed them.   It had taken over half an hour for Tom and Alicia to get him to go into the big toy store in town.  When he couldn't seem to make up his mind Tom had admitted that he used to love Superman when he was growing up and so it was they had returned from the shopping trip with a Superman quilt and lamp.  Conrad wasn't really sure about Superman but it seemed to please Tom that he had them so the boy had kept his silence.  Hearing a sound outside on the landing he realized his father had gone into his bedroom.  Looking at the images of Superman the boy decided the hero wouldn't be afraid of anything so he wasn't going to be.  Placing the big illustrated Oliver Twist book safely under his pillow he trekked to the door telling himself it was okay to leave his room since he hadn't been ordered to stay in it.   His steps slowed momentarily as he sidestepped two creaky patches, anxious not to make a sound which might alert the temperamental adult to his presence.   Sighing in relief he went downstairs as fast as he could and made his way into the large homely kitchen.   The boy really liked the kitchen.  After his bedroom it was his favourite place in the house for this was where Alicia allowed him to help her bake cookies and she never once got angry when he accidentally made a mess.  Advancing on the fridge his stomach grumbled.   He hadn't eaten since lunch and that was a really long time ago.  Opening one large door he eyed the contents.   Sometimes his father made a sandwich for him but this time there was none.  He closed the door and headed over to the fully stocked pantry.  Looking over the stocked shelves he saw a packet of cream crackers close enough to reach so took it down happily.  It was a long time since he had crackers.   Retrieving butter from the fridge he made short work with little hands of buttering four then replaced the packet in the pantry.  Looking at the four crackers on his favourite blue plate sitting on the table he decided he would make cheese crackers like Alicia taught him.  He had managed to cut three slices of cheese down to size using the knife Alicia let him use when footfalls sounded in the hallway and before he knew it his father was standing grimly in the door way ......

"What did he do?" Jude asked patiently when his friend stopped.
"Look what's the point in going over it?   It was years ago."
"You know what the point is.  If you actually talk about it you might stop having nightmares about it."
"As if it's that simple!" Conrad scoffed in disbelief as he turned his attention on the Pacific waters glistening under bright moonlight.
"Nothing simple about this at all," the older man observed solemnly, "but maybe trusting someone else with it will help you.  Isn't it worth a try?"
"Don't know."
"You know you can't go on the way you have been and anything you tell me will stay in this room."
"What happens in Hawai'i stays in Hawai'i?" Conrad gave a wan smile as he looked at his friend.
"Definitely."
"You promise you won't say anything to....,"
"I give you my word.  Whatever you tell me I will never repeat it to Mike, Nic or anyone else.  It stays here in this room."
"Okay," Conrad sighed heavily and returned his gaze to the darkened outside world .....

The boy stood still as his father walked into the kitchen, unsure of what reception he was going to get.

"Boy isn't it late for you to be up?"
"I ..... I forgot the time Sir.  I just wanted to eat .... something," young Conrad glanced at his hastily prepared meal, it didn't look too big he figured.
"Why are you eating such bland food?" Marshall Hawkins walked forward with a stern frown and picked up the blue plate in distaste.
"It's good for growing boys," the boy proudly repeated what Alicia had told him, glad he remembered.
"Like hell it is!   Who told you that rubbish?  Was it Alicia?" the adult went over and binned the food shaking his head.
"No ..... no Sir.   I ...... I saw it ... on TV."
"And you believe everything you see on TV?"
"I'll go to bed Sir," the child decided to cut his losses figuring any answer he gave to that question would not be acceptable.
"You'll stay here and make a meal for yourself," the man directed firmly as he sank down on a kitchen stool, "you're old enough to look after yourself."
"Yes Sir."
"So what are you going to make?"
"I ...... I don't .... know," Conrad confessed uneasily, unsure of a way out of his predicament for try as he might to be a big boy deep down he just knew he wasn't.
"Well make a ham and tomatoe omelette," Hawkins decreed folding his arms, "now hurry on.   You should be in bed."
"Yes Sir," the boy made his way over to the refrigerator and carefully took out a box of eggs to place up on the counter.
"What else do you need?"
"Ah .....," Conrad looked around for the step Tom had bought him to use when he helped Alicia in the kitchen and was about to go and take it out when he remembered his father didn't know about it so kept walking to the pantry instead passing the steps' hiding place, "I need tomatoes."
"Well hurry!"
"Got them," the boy held two red tomatoes in his small hands and placed them beside the hob with the eggs before realizing he wasn't sure what his next step was, "I need the frying pan."
"Okay," the adult quickly took the item off its' hook and placed it on the hob, "I'll take down the big jug as well."
"Thank you," the little boy knew why the big jug was needed for he had watched Alicia making omelettes for Tom but he wasn't sure how she got the eggs out of their shells and he knew he couldn't voice his lack of knowledge so instead when the item was passed to him he placed it on the kitchen table and took the box of eggs down from the counter, all under the watchful gaze of his parent, before placing it on the table also.
"So what are you going to do?" Hawkins demanded impatiently as he retook his seat.
"I'm going to ...... stir the eggs," Conrad opened the box, glad the table was at the right height for him to work, and took out two eggs gently laying them on the table.
"Well hurry on!"
"Yes Sir," the boy picked up an egg eager to please but in his haste he exerted too much pressure on it and the shell cracked causing its' contents to leak out onto the table, "sorr .... sorry ....,"
"Oh you will be boy believe me you will be," Hawkins stood up with a look of rage which caused the boy to start trembling as he backed away from the approaching figure .....

tbc