Jenalyn: A Splitting Personality (#2) [Complete]

Chapter 51: Hayden

Thursday, 10:41 A.M.

Ty doesn't sleep in very long. It's pretty understandable- I know that if he woke up expecting me there beside him, and I wasn't? He'd wake himself up and look for me.

Especially after everything he found out last night...

"You didn't sleep in with me!" he yawns as I step out of his shower wrapped in only a towel. "I told you I cancelled my plans, right? You could've slept in! It was a late night..." 

I had to take a hot shower. I had to after my conversation with Gage a little while ago.

It wasn't... bad. Nothing he said was really bad- but... finding out what I did after that Generation Z concert I went to a while back didn't really do much for my mind.

This whole time, I thought I had slept with Ty that night. And I mean- it doesn't really make a difference in my physical life now- that was then and this is now! I could just feel the monster in my head stir a little just hearing Gage say that I had sex with him though. Not only that I had sex with him- but that the experience for him alone was enough to have him hooked in a way that the monster would be very pleased to have known about.

The shower, despite the scolding hot water that ran down my bare body, didn't do much. I had to at least try to do something to stop all of Jenalyn's toxicity from drowning out Hayden's life though. This monster is hers, and I can't just let it run rampant out here because Gage has had a little crush on me, and decided to mention it while my mind was already crumbling. 

"I'm sorry," I mumble halfmindedly as I pull the towel from my body and begin to dry myself. "I was having a hard time sleeping. I just figured I'd let you sleep in while I cleaned up a little or something."

Ty sleepily nods his head as he pulls himself from his boxers to use the bathroom. He goes to say something for a moment, second guesses it, and tries again.

"Are you... okay?" he asks almost reluctantly. "I mean- I know you're not okay, but like... is there anything I can do to help?" 

I lean up against his bathroom sink, not even bothering to cover my naked body when I glance down to see all of my bruises and notice Ty do the same. 

"I mean... you're doing everything I could've hoped for," I say, shrugging my shoulders as I contemplate if there's anything else he could do besides be there for me, and respect my request for his silence. "-and I know it doesn't seem like it, but you're helping a lot just by understanding that I need this between me and you..." 

Ty lets out a frustrated sigh, running his hand through his hair as he makes his way to where I lean against the counter.

"See, that's the thing Hayden-" he says with both concern and urgency written on his face. "That's not the role I want to play in this! I don't want to be that piece of shit boyfriend that let's the mother of his child run off to Pennsylvania to get pimped out and beaten because she's afraid of some piece of sh-" 

I interrupt him as soon as my mind can string together his words enough to comprehend them.

"You're looking way too far into this, Ty..." I say, trying to keep my voice from sounding as weak as I feel right now. "He's not my pimp- he's my ex, okay? And yeah, shit got out of hand the other night, but that was my fault, Tyler! I shouldn't have been where I was, and I learned my lesson. How he acted was just... how Jena made him act. He's from Jena's life, and Jenalyn is always going to be a thing in his life because that's where I came from! It's... who I am- and to him? It's who I'll always be!"

I trail off for a moment, feeling like I just threw up in my mouth saying that out loud.

I'm not Jenayn- not anymore... I'm Hayden! And I didn't work this hard to build this life so that Jena could come in and wreck it! 

"I'm Hayden now, alright?" I quickly add, trying to soften my tone. "I'm Hayden- who'd rather keep the shit storm of a life that she came from out of the life she's trying to build. For us, and this baby!"

Ty's brows furrow, but he let's out a defeated sigh and takes a small step back to allow me some space. "So you're not going to see him anymore, then?" he says, only trying to make it seem like a question after the fact.

I can't help but roll my eyes. "He's a part of my life, Ty.." I say as I fill in the space he'd left between us. "It may not be the life you know- but it's still my life. I can't just avoid the rest of the people I care about over there because he's a thing. He's an ex of Jena's, and knows I'm Hayden now..."

"Until he needs 'his Jenalyn' again, right?" Ty immediately retorts, snark dripping from his words as he crosses him arms over his chest. "Then it's- what? Back to the crazy fucking ex for a night hoping you don't irk him enough to where he pimps you out, or beats you?!" 

I can feel my blood pulse through my veins as a string of emotions race through my body. I want to be upset that he's being so insensitive right now, but at the same time I completely understand where he's coming from.

"It's not like that, Tyler!" I sigh, trying hard to muster up the right words in my head. "I understand you're upset. It's just complicated, okay? I'm trying to transition into Hayden's life flawlessly, but it's not easy to just drop the entire life I've lived before this- and he's a part of that! He won't always be a thing, just give me time!"

I know he doesn't want to, but Tyler gives in with a sigh and just pulls me into a hug instead of arguing. "I understand the ex thing, Hayden. I'm just not okay with an ex who thinks it's okay to lay hands on a woman, or sell her..." he says, "but- as long as you promise not to seek out running into him in Philly or something... I guess I can work with you until you can fully transition."