I Don't Deserve Love: Alternate Ending

Chapter 15: Hidden Memories

I walked to school not able to keep my smile hidden. The sleepover had gone better than I could have ever hoped. Rosalya was wonderful, I loved her intense personality, and Kim was so relaxed and nice. I still felt like I hardly knew Melody, but that was alright since I had all next year to get to know her. My mind turned to school again. I only had two more weeks until the end of the year and a month of summer vacation. The teachers were starting to talk about finals and as I walked into the school I thought I could feel a sense of anxiety in the air.

"Sato!"

A hand suddenly gripped my shoulder hard. I stood very still, clenching my hands into fists without hardly breathing and willing myself to not rip the crushing hand off my shoulder. A vision of my father appeared behind my eyes and I felt a bead of sweat run down my neck.

"Dude, you're hurting her." I recognized Dajan's voice and the hand was promptly removed. I let out my breath with a painful sigh and tried to compose myself as I faced Brandon, who looked mortified.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Sato! I'm just so stressed, I wasn't even thinking."

"It's fine, Brandon. What's wrong?" I asked, keeping my voice steady and calm as I tried to bury the feelings of fear that were flooding through my entire being.

"I have two projects that I have to finish AND I need to study for my biology test, and then there are finals! I've been making the notecards but I hate finals. I always flunk them!" he exclaimed desperately while stepping towards me, but Dajan held him back while giving me a strange look.

"Sato, are you okay? You look like you saw a ghost."

"What? Me? No, I'm fine," I said hurriedly, trying to sound reassuring.

But that wasn't true. My heart was still racing and I was inwardly shouting at myself to stay calm. No matter how many times someone scared me I never reacted like this. What is the matter with me? I thought desperately as I tried to stop the panic that was bubbling up through my body.

"No really, Sato, you don't look so good," Dajan insisted with obvious concern. I smiled shakily and shook my head.

"It's nothing really. Brandon just... reminded me of something unpleasant," I remarked uneasily. Brandon looked shocked and then his expression turned hurt and I gasped, realizing how that sounded.

"Oh, not YOU you, I meant your hand. You just, umm, it's just..." Brandon went to turn around and I looked desperately at Dajan for help. Dajan stuck out his arm, preventing Brandon from leaving.

"Calm down, man. You probably reminded her of a nightmare or something. You know how jumpy Sato is," Dajan said with a teasing smirk at me, although I could still see the worry in his dark eyes.

"Yes! Exactly. I'm really sorry, Brandon. I would love to help you with studying for your finals." Brandon turned around and slowly smiled.

"Great. I'm sorry I scared you. Those must be some intense nightmares."

"You have no idea," I murmured. "Hey, do you mind if I bring Iris along? She took bio last year too after all; maybe she would have a different approach."

"Sure. I'll have the boys meet in the library after practice. Thanks, Sato."

Brandon and Dajan waved and headed for their lockers. My heart was still pumping hard as I walked down the hall, rubbing my shoulder. Brandon hadn't really grabbed me that hard, but after having it dislocated twice it was hypersensitive. That must be why I freaked out, because his hand is the same size as my father's and he grabbed my bad shoulder, I thought to myself as I got my stuff from chemistry altogether.