Inside an Enigma (Youth Years)

What is Asexuality?

So back in February, I met a boy named Anthony. Long story short, we started dating in May. He didn't understand what "asexual" meant.

So I acknowledge that as a sexual person like yourself, it's very hard to understand how someone cannot feel sexual attraction. I can't think of a more appropriate situation for the phrase "It's not you, it's me". Asexuality is about lack of sexual attraction; I am obviously still able to recognize someone as attractive, but I simply don't feel the desire of having sex with them. To make it easier to understand, I feel the same way you feel about having sex with someone of your own gender. I may not be sexually interested in you, but I am interested in you romantically. All of this may be hard to understand, so I'm willing to answer whatever questions you have. Also, I'll understand if my asexuality is a deal-breaker for you. I just figured you should know where I stand.

Romantic Attraction refers to the level of romantic interest we have for another person. Things like wanting to date someone, feeling emotional attraction and wanting to say "I like you" or "I love you"- it is that it is a different emotional feeling from friendship. There are different forms of love, such as towards family or towards friends, where sexual components are absent. For me, another person may make me experience feelings that i do not feel under other circumstances, such as butterflies, a special connection, automatically smiling at the thought of them or a strong sense of shared values or likes. It's like when you look at someone and have a feeling that makes you think "I'd like to do romantic things with them." What those romantic things entail depends on the person. For some, it may be dates, dinners, holding hands, and "cuddling" or even romantic attraction is what we tend to think of as "love" - you feel a strong emotional connection to a person and want to spend time alone in their company.

I just think it's important to be aware of the fact that my lack of sexual attraction or disinterest in sex is not about you. It's not about the way you look. It's not about your body. It's not about your sexual performance. there are other reasons I am interested in you. I don't need to be sexually attracted to you because I am attracted to you in other ways.