p e r s o n a l l y ☆ 2jae

f i v e

"Choi Youngjae.."

The boy in question could only stare at the floor

"I thought it would be better if we started studying now so would you wanna meet after the lunch break?"

Youngjae sighed, in any other instance he'd be excited at the idea of helping out and being a tutor. He didn't like maths in particular but liked most subject by default.
But his head was hurting; he was tired.
The latter dark haired boy felt his chest tighten up, perhaps it was too big of a jump to immediately start breaking out of the shell that he had built for himself for the majority of his life. Maybe he just needed to tap the shell lightly. Maybe he should have just left that shell alone-

He broke out of his own thoughts by emphasising the awkward standstill that the two had been locked into, "I'm not leaving until you set a date-"

"A.. date?" Youngjae asked in suprise, his natural bright voice breaking through the low and dark aura he had been putting on.

Jaebeom looked airbrushed with a light shade of pink, his brain quickly trying to reformulate the words that had now betrayed him,

"A date when you're free so we can study."

"Right," the younger confirmed. It was then an idea popped into Youngjae's head, "Fine, I'll come study with you after lunch today."

"Really?"

"Yeah," he replied hesitantly.

A small smile crept onto Jaebeom's face without his knowledge or intention. Although he wouldn't ever admit it to anybody, he was looking forward to this.
He admired Youngjae.

It hadn't even been 5 seconds before Jaebeom shook himself mentally out of his hazy excitement so he could thank Youngjae for even sparing his time.

But Youngjae had already disappeared from sight.

He's being strange.

The only thing, the now alone in an empty hallway, Jaebeom could think was that Choi Youngjae was being. . . strange.

He didn't particularly like how sour Mr Popular was being. And why should he? This was supposed to be the one with all the friends. He was the one always smiling.

Why today, of all days and with all people, was Youngjae being so cold to him?

A twinge of hurt threaded through Jaebeom's hazy mind, inside he hoped that it wasn't something personal to him. That didn't last for long though since he himself knew that he shouldn't hope too much.

But he did hope that he hadn't left things too late.

*

*

*

Youngjae's phone buzzed as he turned the corner.
He felt like he was being deceptive, a tricky game that he didn't like playing but felt like there was no other choice.

He just wanted to be selfish.
The screen of his phone lit up with incoming message notifications.

___________

Fendi-wang
U OK?

Youngjae
Yeah.

Fendi-wang
Sure?? U don't seem so good today

Fendi-wang
U coming to lunch?

Fendi-wang
If somethings happened u kno you can talk to me about anything right

Fendi-wang
ur really important to me please know im here if u need me
read

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Youngjae switched his phone to silent and shoved it back into the pocket of his hoodie. Although it was lunch he wasn't very hungry.

Unfortunately for him, the troubled boy had to now abort his plan of hiding out in the library in fears of catching Jaebeom there again.

In all honestly he wasn't planning on tutoring Jaebeom after lunch, and instead planned to go straight home after even if this did mean skipping his very last lesson of the day- and skipping his study date.

Study date...

Study session.

He meekly walked into the empty bathroom across the hall and locked himself into the stall furthest from the door. Usually at lunch he would meet Mark and Jackson by the front gate, before heading into the high street nearby to get a cheap meal deal or something from a fast food place. Sometimes they'd catch Jinyoung on a bench somewhere reading and invite him along too, but either way there was always a full house.

With an abrupt shaking of his head he tried to clear out his thoughts. He passed his time by scrolling through Twitter as the realisation of how alone he truly felt dawned on him.

*

*

As he heard the shrill of the bell signalling the end of lunch, the solemn boy heaved his weary body out of the stall. Murmers and footsteps filled his ears as he walked back into the main hallway once again. People were busy heading to lessons or the library;

Youngjae was dead set on heading home.

He passed though the back entrance and pulled out his headphones to start listening to some music on his daily commute home.
Another notification light blinked at him from a number he didn't recognize.

He sighed. A large lump dropped to the base of his stomach as his feet carried him further and further away from school grounds.

__________

Unknown Number
this is jaebeom yugyeom gave me your number

Unknown Number
where are you
read

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