Personal Diary / Journal - art, addiction and a whole lotta love

2020 Mar 23 Monday

Ah the beginning of the week. I was saying to Baby Love that i like the beginning of the week. We return to the regular activities, versus the weekend which is a bit hectic. She agreed.

Yesterday i felt the need to organize myself and i took inspiration from this life management game i'm playing. I devised a chart of parameters for my personal status at any given moment. It has the following factors: health, feeling in my body (this includes stress versus relaxation, the feeling of rest, etc), mood, brain-power, finance, and the feeling of being sated. The sated thing is concerned with my addiction, the feeling of frustration, cravings, hunger and the likes. I entered them all in a way that the highest the score, the better.

Then i made a list of activities, another chart where for each of them i rated how they influence these key indicators, either growing the number or diminishing it. Let me see if i can paste this chart here.

Health Mood Body Satiated Brain Finance
Smoke — + — + + —
Coffee — + — + + —
Alcohol — + + + — —
Sweets — + — + + —
Food + + + + —

Mind / body + + + + +
Music + — — +
Read / write + + — +
Games + — — +
Entertain + — — +

Clean + + — + +
Exercise / walk + + — + +

Perform publicly + + — — + +

There we go. I hope it goes ok with the publishing platform, otherwise i may import a screenshot.

I wonder how will going to the bathroom bode for my body parameter.

[..] i ate something frugal and i'm feeling really good. My sated parameter is at 100. The purpose of these weeks is to become acquainted with statuses of being less sated. I am using another app to monitor this parameter closely. An idea is to go and smoke only when it drops to 80% or something. Currently at 95%. I think 80% is a bit too much, unrealistic. Maybe we'll try 90% and go from there. Writing and reading are activities which enhance the cravings. But that's not to say that they are to be avoided. The whole point is not to avoid cravings, it's to befriend them and not give in every time, befriend a state of being less sated.