Mine To Forget

34. A step towards better

The next day, I was walking through the corridors with my hoodie and earphones on, avoiding every human. I was silent, minding my own business and walking with my head down, with music blasting in my ears when someone pushed past me, running.

"What the ..." I take my earphones off to see everyone running towards the cafeteria. I look around to see people whispering and then I hear it--the same thing happened when I was new here.

When Aiden and Alex were fighting.

Shit!

I increase my speed to where everyone was going. As I push through the crowd. I see Aiden holding Alex's collar and Alex saying "I don't know what the fuck you are talking about Aiden!"

"You are a fucking liar!" Aiden shouted at him.

"What the fuck!" I hear Stacy, who is now standing next to me. I look at her and could see concern filling up her eyes.

"Aiden let go, I am telling you, I don't know the fuck you are talking about!" Alex tried to free himself.

"I told you not to mess with my family. I warned you to stay away!" and then he was about to punch Alex when I pushed him away.

"Aiden, enough!" I stood between them. "Enough!" I said looking straight into his eyes.

"April, stay out of this," Alex said. 

I turn around to look at him. "No! It's all my fault!" I said. 

"April.." Aiden said and I looked at him. He was angry. The last time I interrupted him, things didn't go very well with the both of us. He tried to key my car and then he got keyed instead. Then this whole Josh drama started. But today, things are the exact opposite of what they used to be. Aiden and I got close, well, until he said what he said about me not having a family.

"What are you talking about, April?" Alex asked me. He was as confused as Stacy was. 

"I swear, I will tell you everything later." I looked back at Aiden.

"He doesn't know anything. It's not his fault Aiden. So back off! Now!" I tell him. "Please," I added. 

Aiden looked at me and then he huffed and walked away. Alex took the opportunity and he pulled me with him towards a quiet place and Stacy followed us.

"What the hell did you do, April?" He jerked my hand and by that, you could tell that he was angry.

"Alex ....I...." I wanted to say something to him but I had no words for him. What can I say?

Hi Alex! I told Aiden's mom that she should be your mom too and Aiden wants to be your big brother! How does that sound? Pretty stupid right, yeah that's it. 

"April? I am asking you something."

"I may or may not have told Suzanne to consider you as a part of their family." I fumbled at the last part.

"You what?" Stacy and Alex exclaimed at me at the same time.

"You did what?" Alex asked me. I had no courage to look up at him and answer him.

"I am sorry Alex... I was just trying to help ........" I tried to say but Alex cut me off.

"Did I ask you for your help, April? Why would you do something like that? They already hate me enough. I can't handle any more of it, April" He said and then shook his head in disbelief and then walked away. 

"Alex ........." I tried to call after him but he didn't even listen to me.

I was just trying to do something nice and I ended up ruining everything. Aiden was right, I should have just stayed out of this. Oh god! Now I am contemplating if I did the right thing or just made it all worse.

I felt worse.

I looked at Stacy. She was still here. "Aren't you pissed off too?" I ask her, on the edge of crying.

"No." She said and smiled at me.

"Why?" 

"Because I know you didn't do it to hurt Alex or Aiden or Suzanne. You had their best interest in your heart, April Collins. So I understand," she said to me and hugged me.

At this moment, I knew things were gonna be fine.

Later that day, I went back home to see Suzanne sitting on my front porch. I got out of my car and went to sit next to her. 

She didn't say anything either. We sat there in silence. I knew she had something to say, so much to say. The way she looked, gave it away that she was just finding the right words to say to me. I have no clue what she must be feeling right now but I was happy that she is here. It's a step towards-- something.

"When I found out that my husband had an affair with some I ....... I wasn't sure how to react. I had two kids but he had three. I wasn't surprised, just worried about the kids you know. As a mother you do everything in your power to make sure that your kids are okay, they are safe, away from anything that might harm them and the fear of them having to bear that sadness or pain kills me. I couldn't see Alex in the eyes when he first came home. I was just thinking about me mostly, and then my kids. When you told me about Alex. I, for the first time in my life, realized that it was not his fault," she said, as tears rolled down her cheeks and she kept on wiping them but they didn't stop. 

"I was selfish but I was heartbroken and scared and worried and I can't change what happened and what should have happened. I imagined what if ........ what if I was on the other side and Alex was my kid. What would I want for him if I was gone?" She turned towards me, facing me.

"I would want someone to love him as I would and I would beg God to protect him from all the bad things I did, and you made me realize that and I am so sorry." And then she hugged me and broke down.

"No. No Suzanne. You have nothing to be sorry about. You are the best mother and the kindest person I know. Whatever you did is justified. Hell, if I was in your place, I am a hundred percent sure I would have done the same thing. You did what everyone would do. You were not selfish. You are the most selfless person I have ever seen. You, sitting in front of me, trying to  understand Alex makes you the greatest person, and trust me, Suzanne, you are." I rubbed her back as she let those tears fall.

She looked up at me and gave me a small smile. This was a step towards something better.