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I Lost Her

In the beginning, Jungkook and Eunji's relationship consisted of cuddles, playfulness, trust, and adoration for one another. Whenever Jungkook looked at Eunji, it was clear that his eyes were full of love and affection. Eunji had never thought she could be this happy. Maybe it was too good to be true, and she was slowly starting to believe that.

Being the girlfriend of a worldwide k-pop idol, Eunji knew better than to complain about not getting as much attention from her boyfriend. In fact she supported his dreams, even if it took a toll on their relationship. But there was a point where things got messy.

It started with him cancelling dates or leaving her stood up. The excuses Jungkook used were, "Sorry I'm busy right now," "Oh I forgot about it," or "I'll make it up to you, Jagiya." Eunji wasn't bothered in the beginning. Her schedule was busy herself with balancing college and her internship. But even with her schedule, she always made time to spend with Jungkook only to be turned down every time.

Hours turned to days, days turned to weeks, and weeks turned into months of no Jungkook. Whenever she attended her friends' gatherings, they would all bring their boyfriends. Then there would just be her at the end of the table drinking alone, watching the couples have fun. This left Eunji to ponder if she was in a relationship at all.

Was it her? Was she not good enough for him to want to make time for her? These insecurities grew inside of Eunji, leaving her to feel self conscious. She stopped texting him only to be ignored and stopped calling only to be left on voicemail.

But there was still a small bit of hope inside her. She was to have an upcoming recital that she really wanted Jungkook to come to. This was an important recital where people from agencies will be coming to observe. Additionally with her terrible stage fright, Eunji felt more nervous than usual at the thought of this.

"You'll really come?" Eunji asked over the phone, trying not to sound pessimistic.

"Of course I'll be there Jagi," Jungkook reassured her with his soothing voice. "I wouldn't miss it for the world."

Eunji really hoped that Jungkook would stay true to his words. After all those times looking like a pathetic fool whenever Jungkook never showed up to their dates, Eunji was holding on to the very end of the rope.

When the day of the recital finally arrived, after countless hours of practicing, Eunji still wasn't certain if Jungkook would stay true to his word.

"Will he really be here?" Eunji murmured to herself in the mirror, backstage.

She was wearing a white lace dress with a modest neckline and sleeves that came down to her elbows. She had curled her hair into loose waves and put on the pearl earrings Jungkook had bought for her awhile ago.

Soon it was her turn to go up next. She stood behind the stage trembling as she did her vocal exercises. She could do this, she had prepared so much for this moment. He . . . he would be here, right?

"Kim Eunji, you're up," One of the stage crew people whispered to her.

Eunji felt mindless as she walked queasily onto stage. She stopped where the microphone stood at the center of the stage and her eyes fell on the audience. Her eyes darted around the various people, hoping to lock eyes with Jungkook. She grasped the microphone, still looking for his face. It was dark, so she knew it would be harder to find him. She started to sing, hoping she might find him as she did so.

"Looking down this dark faceless road

A larva I'm all alone

Crawling, praying to be something new