𝙉𝙤𝙬 𝙄'𝙢 𝙃𝙚𝙧𝙚 || ᴅᴇᴀʟᴏʀ ✓

16 - How it hurts deep inside

Veronica! What was she doing here? I thought as I saw the couple walk down in the restaurant. Freddie then turned his head and his eyes met mine.

Shit. He saw us! My eyes went wide as he walked towards our table, smiling, and introduced us to his 'date'.

"Hi, darlings. Didn't expect to see you here." He started. I can feel the tension in the air and Roger's eyes is directly glaring at the person clutching on Freddie's arm.

Both of us didn't respond so he cleared his throat and spoke again. "John, this is Veronica. She was the one I was talking to you about earlier." He smiled and Veronica held out her hand. "Hi. Nice to meet you." She smirked.

Roger sharply looked at me when I reached out for her hand and shook it. I swear I felt her hand tighten on mine as her smirk grew. "Oh. And this is Roger." Freddie pointed at my boyfriend and Veronica held out her hand to him.

Roger just glared at her hand and she must've felt embarrassed because he wasn't planning on reaching it so she just put it down. If looks could kill, Veronica must've been dead right now by the way my boyfriend is staring at her.

Freddie broke the obvious tension that has built up. "Anyway, it was nice seeing you two here. We'll be having our dinner now." Then he led Veronica to their reserved table.

"What the fuck is he doing with that woman!" Roger half whispered strongly and I widened my eyes at him. "Lower your voice. He'll hear you." I whispered back.

He huffed and slammed his utensils on the table. "I want to get out of here. Right. Now." He said with gritted teeth so I waved at our server and I paid our tab. Roger stormed off the restaurant while I went to pay so I didn't wait for my change and just rushed off to him outside.

"The audacity, John. The audacity for her to show her face in front of us after what she did!" He shouted, waving his arms with exaggeration. I hushed and hugged him tightly. "Shh... Calm down, let's go back to the hotel, okay?" He nodded and I hailed a cab.

Roger was still shaking with anger as we entered the room and he slumped down on the bed. "I can't believe I'm seeing her again." He said and I saw tears forming in his eyes.

"No. No. Don't cry, love. Don't let her get to you, please." I hugged him as he was wiping his tears from his cheeks and he shook his head. "You don't understand, John. I can't just let her be in our lives again." I held his hand to stop it from shaking.

"I don't want her ruining our relationship again. I just can't let that happen. I can't. I just can't." His sobs were getting harder as he hiccupped through the words, then he held his stomach and stood up. "Oh god..." He whispered.

Roger ran to the loo and locked the door. I sat on the bed, waiting for him to come out when his shrill scream echoed throughout the room. I immediately ran to the door and knocked. "Love? What happened? Open the door for me, please." My heart was beating so fast as I heard him wailing and screaming as he cried.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, babe." His voice was so weak so I pushed the door open and saw Roger sitting on the toilet with his hands over his face. He was still shaking and my heart sank when I grasped the scene in front of me.

He had his pants down and it was...

...it was full of blood!

I wept and hugged him tight while he continued saying "sorry" over an over again as I cried my heart out, getting all of the pain out of my chest.

"I'm really sorry. I was careless. It was my fault. I'm so sorry, babe." My heart broke as Roger spoke out those words and I immediately gave him little kisses on his lips. "No. Don't say that. It's not your fault." I rubbed his back to calm him down a bit.

"Come on, love. I'll take you to bed." He nodded and I helped him stand up, removing his pants and underwear and took him back to the room. I got him another clean pair then let him settle on his side of the bed.

Tears were still flowing from his eyes and he was rubbing his tummy. I can feel his hurt and I don't know how to make him feel better. I don't even know how to make myself feel better. It just hurts so fucking much!

I laid beside him on the bed and kissed his lips. He looked at me with glossy eyes and I touched his cheek. "When did you know?" I asked him and he looked down. "A month ago."

"When were you planning on telling me?" I kissed his hand and rubbed it with my thumb. "Christmas." He sighed heavily then cried again. I held his head up and kissed him on the lips.

"I can't take seeing you crying like this, love. It hurts me so much." I was also shedding tears and he just nodded at me. "I didn't mean for this to happen. I'm so sorry. Please don't stop loving me."

"I won't ever stop loving you, Roger." I kissed his forehead and let him lie comfortably to the bed as I rubbed his tummy. "I just won't. Always remember that."

*
Roger wasn't being himself ever since that night. He would space out a lot and stare in emptiness. My heart hurts for him so much. I was so broken-hearted just by seeing the pain in his eyes. He wanted it. He wanted this baby so much and he lost it. Just that alone crushed his heart into pieces.

We were in the middle of our concert in Chicago and Roger messed up the harmonies in 'Somebody to Love'. Freddie was already glaring at Roger but the drummer was unaware of the singer's deathly stares.

I went near Freddie on the piano, shaking my head to tell him to just let it go, but knowing him, he won't let him go. His biggest peeve is being embarrassed in front of an audience and right now, Roger was embarrassing him.

Freddie stormed off to the dressing room after the show to find Roger and he immediately came face to face with him. "How dare you mess up the concert? What were you thinking? This is your only job and you can't even do it right." The singer yelled at him and my boyfriend just pushed him away in the chest.

"What the fuck? How dare you do that to me!" Freddie was fuming as Roger continuously ignored him then sat on the couch. "Fucking get up!" He pulled my boyfriend's collar and stood him up.

Brian pulled Freddie away and I hugged Roger, who already has his head down and was sobbing. "Fucking cry baby! Don't fucking cry on me!" He screamed at my boyfriend and I turned to face him.

"Stop it. Just stop it, Freddie!" I shouted and I pushed him away as he tried to go near Roger again. "Can't you see how upset he is? Just stop it!" I waved my hand at him and he furrowed his brows at me.

"He wouldn't be upset if he did his job well, would it?" He said sarcastically and Brian pulled Freddie away when I tried to attack him. He was getting on my nerves and I was losing all the patience that I have right now.

"We just lost our baby and he's grieving right now! And you're here being a fucking inconsiderate asshole just because you got embarrassed on stage!" I shouted. Brian looked shocked and Freddie's eyes softened.

"What hurts more, huh? Losing your baby or a little stage mishap? Tell me what, right now!" Roger hugged my waist and buried his head on my chest. "Stop it. I don't want to hear about my baby anymore." He whispered then I calmed down.

I led Roger out of the dressing room and Freddie tried following us but I sharply turned to him, telling him to back off. I don't want to hear any word from him. He had hurt my boyfriend and I won't take it.

Roger didn't stop crying until we got back to the hotel room. "I'm really sorry, babe. I'm sorry I lost our baby." He said as he laid down on the bed.

"Shh... It's not your fault. Don't think about it right now, okay?" I kissed his forehead and ran my hand through his hair. "Rest your body. I know you're exhausted." He nodded and he closed his eyes.

I sighed as I kept my tears from falling down my cheek. I want to be strong for Roger, but how can I do it if I'm also hurting?

I laid down next to him as I hugged his waist and kissed his cheek.

"As long as you're here by my side, I'll always try to be strong for you. I promise."