𝙉𝙤𝙬 𝙄'𝙢 𝙃𝙚𝙧𝙚 || ᴅᴇᴀʟᴏʀ ✓

12 - Pull yourself together

I waved at Crystal, Roger's personal assistant, when I saw him down the hotel lobby and he immediately hurried down to me. "Hey. I have a favor to ask you. Will that be okay?" I said. He nodded then I handed him a medium sized brown box. It was a half a dozen of Roger's favorite mini chocolate chip muffins that I bought at the bakeshop down the road.

"Could you give this to Roger, please?" I smiled a little and Crystal reluctantly took it from me. "I'll try. But you know where this'll end up." He scratched his head and I nodded sadly. The last time I gave something to Roger, it went straight to the trash can.

I sighed heavily. "Yeah. I know." Crystal smiled at me and patted my shoulder. "Why do you keep trying, John? It's been years since the two of you have split." He asked curiously and I just looked at him, unsure of what to say.

"It's love. I still love him." My eyes glistened and he nodded. "I'll make sure he gets this." Then he turned his back and went on his way.

I looked up to prevent my eyes from shedding any unwanted tears then I took my room key from my pocket and laid on the bed. Crystal's words kept replaying again and again on my mind like a broken stereo.

Why do I still keep trying?

He's obviously still hurting, and maybe he hasn't moved on. Or maybe he hasn't forgiven me yet. That's probably the reason why he doesn't entertain my advances. He probably built an invisible wall around him to stop me from getting closer.

I still want him. I still love him. I want my love back.

But one question lingers on my mind: Do I want him back because I still love him, or do I just feel guilty because of what I did to him?

I shrugged away those thoughts out of my head and sat up. No. I love him. I never stopped loving him and I'll do everything to get his trust and his love back.

A knock on the door distracted me and I went to open it. It was Dave, the band's overall assistant. "Hi John. Everyone's on the bus now. Are you ready?" He said and I took my jacket from the bed and went with him.

Everything is already ready at the performance hall. Our costumes has been dry cleaned and the instruments are all set up and we just need to do a quick sound check before the performance tonight.

Freddie insisted on getting a big room to be the common dressing room, so we would all be there to wait until they call us. I sat at the side of the couch and stretched my legs up. Brian was tapping his hands at the table while reading a magazine, and Freddie was being... well, Freddie.

Roger was sitting in front of a mirror and he was fixing his hair when Crystal entered the room and handed over the brown box I asked him to give to the drummer. He looked at his assistant, all confused and his brows were furrowed then hesitantly took the box.

I silently thanked Crystal as he walked past me and I saw Roger smile as he happily munched on one of the muffins. My heart fluttered as he got all giddy and he finished two in one sitting. I smiled to myself as I watched him from the corner of the room. "Some things never change, doesn't it?" I mumbled.

The show was a blast and everyone loved us. They chanted for an encore as we exited and Freddie pulled us out of the stage to perform two more songs before finally ending the show.

Our set for this show included a song I wrote for the last album, its "You're my best friend".

Oh, you're the best friend that I ever had
I've been with you such a long time
You're my sunshine and I want you to know
That my feelings are true
I really love you
Oh, you're my best friend