Cliche (Candy Stories #5)

Chapter 21 part 2

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"Maxwell already told Miss Kylie about going to New York. Magiging replacement niya si Chef Clark from their restaurant," kuwento ni Celine. "I thought it's sudden and out of timing but he didn't say anything more."

Magkaharap kami sa Ambrose. Family restaurant iyon na pasta ang specialty. Kahit hindi ko pinlano, kaming dalawa ang magkasamang mag-review.

"But what's up with him and Calyx? Bakit sila ang magkasama?" aniya at tuwid na tumingin sa 'kin. "Nagsabi lang sila sa 'kin kaninang umaga na ayusin ang set-up. Binasted mo ba?"

Nasamid ako sa tubig na iniinom ko. Timing pa kasi talaga. She laughed a little and passed me the box of tissue.

"Binasted mo nga silang dalawa? I mean, yes, basted si Maxwell pero akala ko, kayo na ni Calyx. Nag-away kayo? Nag-break?"

Hu-hu-hu. I like Celine as a friend but I don't think I could tell her about Maxwell and Calyx and me. Baka hindi niya ako maintindihan.

She might have felt my indecision because she smiled.

"They both like you since college. I know that much," she said. "When the girls don't talk about you and Maxwell, they talk about you and Calyx. I don't understand why they were so invested, except baka naiinggit. They'd always say that you already have Calyx by your side. Unfair daw na may Maxwell pa. Maraming may gusto sa dalawang 'yon, alam mo 'yon? Anyway, a lot of us were suspicious about Calyx's real feelings for you. Ikaw lang yata ang wala talagang idea dati."

Nanlaki ang mga mata ko. Sinasabi ba niyang obvious 'yong feelings ni Calyx sa 'kin kahit dati pa? Bulag lang ako?

Tumawa naman uli siya. "Wala ka nga talagang idea," aniya.

I pouted and looked at the flowers on our table. May rose sa mix. Naalala ko ang bulaklak na bigay ni Maxwell dahil sa tinik niyon. Tinanggalan niya ng tinik ang bulaklak na para sa akin para hindi ako masaktan . . . kahit na baka siya ang nasaktan. He doesn't want me hurt, yet I always push him away. I blamed him for the bad things that's not in his control. I broke his heart.

And all the time, Calyx watched over me. Dahil baka masaktan ako. Pero kahit siya, sinaktan ko.

For both of them, I'm like the thorn they should remove to avoid getting hurt. I'm my own thorn too and I don't want to continue being like this.

"Calyx has . . . always been good to me," I found myself saying. "I don't know if it's because he's always like that, kaya hindi ako nag-isip ng anuman." Or maybe it's because I'm always smitten by Maxwell that I couldn't spare Calyx second thoughts. Or maybe because I always thought it would be impossible for any of them to like me.

"The truth is . . . Calyx and I were just pretending to be a couple. I didn't know that he really has feelings for me." Nahihiya akong marinig sa sarili kong bibig ang mga salita. Kasi sa likod ng isip ko, naniniwala pa rin akong imposible akong magustuhan. "Do you think . . . I deserve to be loved by both of them?" tanong ko kay Celine. "Kasi, parang mali, 'di ba? They deserve someone better—someone like you."

She looked at me thoughtfully. "And why am I better than you?"

"What?"

Mahina siyang tumawa. "My opinion—or anyone's opinion—about whether you deserve to be loved or not doesn't matter. They love you without questions. What matters is what you think about it. Sa kanilang dalawa, 'yong iisipin mo lang ang importante. Sana sa 'yo rin."

I bit my lip. "How could you say the nicest things? We're new friends but . . ."

"Totoo 'yong sinabi ko. Personally, tingin ko, deserve ng lahat ng tao na mahalin—'yong mga remarkable, 'yong mga works-in-progress, kahit 'yong mga chismosang receptionist. That's one of life's good things. 'Yong kahit na ano pa tayo o ang ibang tao, may nakalaang magmahal sa 'tin. Love doesn't ask who's deserving or not. It just happens. And thank god for that, kasi kung magwo-work ang mundo base sa kung sino lang ang deserving, a lot of us who are lost won't ever be found. Those who are broken won't ever mend. Those who are angry won't ever find clarity." Tumitig si Celine sa 'kin. "In my opinion, you deserve to be loved, Aurora. You deserve to express your love too. I hope you start believing that."