❝Kid, don't do that!❞ It was as if I could almost feel him smile-Hear it in his voice, let the warmth of it deluge my heart.
❝Why not?❞
❝It tickles, Allan.❞ I looked into his eyes as he chuckled. Just then i noticed a strange spark of uncertainty a...
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"We talked about this. We talked about her, Jace." We stood outside the bookstore after I had rushed out abruptly.
"Allan neither one of us knew she was going to be here." He held my hand. I jerked it away.
"This isn't fucking fair. She's just EVERYWHERE. EVERY-FUCKING-WHERE!"
I had tears building up in my eyes. We talked about her that day. On the ledge. We made sure we stayed away from her. But she was everywhere.
Everywhere.
"Let's just go home Allan." His voice was calm. And brought relief.
I looked at him. He was still here. Right next to me trying to calm me down. He was still here bearing me. He didn't have to. He could've walked away just like that. He could've left me with no control over anything whatsoever. He could've. But he didn't.
He was still here holding me in his arms and he was still here handling my shit.
I kissed him.
He was shocked, I could feel it by the way his fingers rumbled on my face at first. But we got right into it. I reached for his hand which was cupped around my face and took it in mine. I leaned back and I was suddenly pulling him onto the pavement.
We walked down to the car in silence, hand in hand. We reached home without uttering another word. We sneaked in silently to my bedroom and I jumped right onto the bed without a second thought.
There was no one home except dad and mom. Jessica had gone to some old friends house for a stayover. I missed the Montells. Jace did too. Well Carli and Aunt Nelly had gone to North Haven for a week. Duy and Uncle Dean flew back to Paris a few days ago. "It's quite, isn't it?" I asked.
Jace slowly walked to the edge of the bed and sat there beside me. Our shoulders next to each other as I took off the swearshirt I was wearing.
"Allan you need to stop letting—" I kissed him, cutting him out.
I leaned out. "Not tonight." And I kissed him once more. Before I couldn't stop. Before he couldn't stop.
He took off the sweatshirt he was wearing and pushed me down to the bed. It was quick but I liked it the way his body felt between my legs. It was what he wanted. It was what I wanted.
He stretched my arms onto the bed, holding them by his hands as he kissed me more rapidly and deeply every time.
He let go of my arms and moved down to my neck. It felt different the way his lips moved against my skin. Wet and soft and slow, yet hard and raspy and quick all at once.
We didn't sleep. We couldn't. I was insecure about him. And this was the only way to feel secure.
