❝Kid, don't do that!❞ It was as if I could almost feel him smile-Hear it in his voice, let the warmth of it deluge my heart.
❝Why not?❞
❝It tickles, Allan.❞ I looked into his eyes as he chuckled. Just then i noticed a strange spark of uncertainty a...
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❁ A WEEK LATER ❁
Things were okay. Even though there was no change to the overall situation, things seemed to work a bit well. There weren't new developments as such. Just a very few minor ones.
Dad and Mom were out on a trip. It was a small trip but by the sound of it, an amazing one. Winter winds were just flowing in through the nights—slowly and patiently. And so Mom decided why not take a break from the city air and enjoy somewhere less hectic which initially lead my parents and Cole's parents and Jace's mom to go on a road trip to Mohegan Sun.
Things were sorta better at school too. I mean yeah those death stares and that crazy crap about my sexuality is still going on around like a fucking wildfire—never stopping anytime soon though. But I've started enjoying. Enjoying the time at school. I guess thats cus I got some new friends. But not sure if I should call them friends.
I don't sit alone anymore at lunch. I sit with Maddie and Bram and Ali and Cole. And Jace. At first, it was a little awkward but now I really like sitting with them.
I wonder if i am desperate. If me wanting to sit with them seems desperate. I mean would it be wrong to be desperate for company if you've been lonely half your life? But I am not even sure if I am desperate. If to call this desperation or an urge.
And Jace. There is something intriguing about that guy. Strangely shocking. The guy is sweet. But unpredictable. He is really fit though. Why doesn't he go gor the Football team? Bet he would get selected. He also sat next to me in The Centre for our suicide prevention therapy session and we literally giggked the whole time.
We talk a lot. We started texting too. Just casually. It's fun talking to him. He knows how to handle the conversation and keep it going unlike me. And I find that good.
The winter trip was coming up. Every year our school took us out for a stay at a good resort a week or two before Christmas. I never went after fifth grade. So I won't be going this year as well. Why go on a trip when you gonna do the same thing at home—read in a blanket. Jessica used to love the Winter Trips. Everyone loves the Winter Trips.
Also, Jessica was getting busier. She wouldn't call much and whenever she did, she would hang up within 30 minutes. I missed her. Her cookies and our nights out at new places. I missed her a lot but I guess she has gotten used to a new world with a different environment and different people. She doesn't notice, but we are growing apart.
Apparently Nishi was also coming back in two days. I missed her but I don't think so she missed me. I think this is what my life is going to be. Forever. Just a little spot on someone's way to something big, but not the destination. I think this is what it is like to be around me—a little strange. something new, something that would make you feel positive for a while. Something you'd feel an urge to explore.
But then after you've stayed for long enough, you will be bored out of it. You will want something new. Something bigger and better to explore. Cus I am just the same me. The simple fucked yet boring me.
And I'm not so sure if people would like me the way I am. So I'll try. To my fullest. But what is the use when the people I am doing all of this for are just gonna walk out and apart?
❁❁❁
So this was just a fun catching up chapter. Hope y'all liked it. Don't forget to vote.
Also Thank you so much for 300+ reads. This is amazing.
