Neither you nor me

Part 68

He left me! Riley left me! That's the harsh truth! I don't know if he will come back or not. Nothing seems to pacify me. Not even the water that once used to calm the inner me.

It's been more than one hour since I have been standing beneath the shower. I haven’t even opened my dress that I wore in this morning. The water is gradually dripping from my head to my shoulder then to my toes by the lining of my body. My eyes have turned red due to constant crying and the water. My skin wrinkled and turned white. I have started to feel cold but I feel an amount of comfort.

I can hear Stacy screaming outside the door and I know she is standing with an army. Any moment, they will be breaking the door. But I don't care. I don't fucking care. What Riley did to Eve, must be more shocking to me but the fact that Riley left me is most heartbroken.

The door burst open and the heavy metallic door fell into the ground with a huge ruckus. I slowly turned my head. Just as I said, a number of bodyguards broke the door and slowly entered here. Mr Hyde just turned the shower off and Stacy wrapped me in a towel. I can hear Emmy saying
"Holy hell, Alis! Get a grip on yourself"

Grip? Didn’t Riley meant to get a grip on me?

Stacy took me outside the washroom and ordered everybody to leave us alone. She consoled
"Alis, you are shivering"
I looked at me. She is right! I haven’t noticed me. I'm shivering in cold.
"Alaska, we all are with you"
"What did he told you?" I asked with extreme hardness. I hadn’t noticed my voice broke and I'm having trouble in speaking.

Stacy told she and Emmy would call Riley and pacify him. Even Emmy approached him. But he denied gradually.
"Leave that bloody coward" Stacy huffed
"He denied. Didn’t he?" I again asked with my sour voice and an eyes full of lostness.

"Alaska, what Riley did to you is unjustified. But you can't hurt yourself! Remember, Riley left you for the baby and you are harming the baby now. What's the point?"

Her words deeply impacted me. She is right! I have to take care of myself. For the baby. But Riley! Whenever he comes in my mind, I can't stop crying!

I broke down and Stacy consoled me again. Finally, by her words, I changed into clean clothes. It's past midnight and I'm on my bed in a hope that Riley might come now and like all other night, we would sleep by cuddling together. He will say sorry to me for being protective and again we will live happily like we did before.

I miss him! I had a keen hope that he might text or call me, to know my condition. But he will know it either way through my guards. I buried my face into the pillow. I have been crying the whole day. Hence, a bad headache has been constant pain. But no tears seem enough to pull up a stop.

I woke up by the summonings of Stacy. Her warming hand is caressing my hair and my face. She is worried for some reason. I stretched my hands and asked
"What happened?"
"Open your mouth" she ordered.
"What?" I asked.
"Just do what I say"

I opened my mouth and she inserted a thermometer there. I didn’t caught cold. Did I?

She took the thermometer after a minute and looked at the rating. She looks more worried
"How much it is?" I asked with runny nose
"Much more than your normal temperature. Now lay down. I gotta get your breakfast and medicine"

Stacy brought a cart of breakfast and medicine. It seems like I'm ill. But mental health is more important than physical one. I know I need Riley as my medicine.

Eve came to meet me after some time. She is not alone, Darius came too. Now, I can find some similarities in their face.
"I'm sorry to bring this news like this. I never meant to" Eve said nervously
"It's okay" I said weakly and shit, my throat hurts.
"You need to take care of yourself. The actions shouldn’t be repeated. You need to keep that tyke safe" Eve consoled me.

She prescribed medicines with a lecture of safety cautions. Darius was nice to me but left with a smirk. He was right! Spencers always leaves.

I got ready and sneaked out of the house without conscience of Stacy. She wouldn’t lemme go out in this condition but I can't live for a second in his house and in this room.

This room and this house holds memories of us in every corner. I know if I stay here, I would do nothing except crying. I feel weak to go out but I guessed that's a smart decision. I obviously took Mr Hyde with me but left 6 bodyguards back in the mansion. I'm gonna get an earful from Stacy for this! Mr Hyde is happy about it. Earlier, he said I don't need 6 bodyguards to be protected. He alone is enough. But Riley anyway hired them. He felt inferior. But now, I'm alone with him and he is happy.

The car stopped in front of my company. Actually, I thought to sneak here for a while to distract me as I have nowhere to go. And I might get to see Riley, though we rarely meet in the office timing.

I slowly stepped down and I'm looking with more focus in everyone I see. I just wanna see the face of Riley just once. I wanna know how he is!

I stepped into the elevator and went to the kitchen as I always do. Brezo came running to me from a very far distance with a paper in his hand. He came near me and panted
"Here Alaska. You didn’t need to come. I would deliver it at your house"

He gave me the paper and I knew it once by reviewing. Resignation letter. I recalled yesterday morning, Riley told to quit the job. I nearly forgot all this. Brezo told
"Alis, consider for a moment. Don't leave this job. Does it seems unfit to you?"

I was told to hide my pregnancy from everyone but Brezo is my close one. I can't help but tell him everything. Tears started flooding and the paper has became wet. Brezo clutched my shoulder and dragged me in a corner. He looks a bit surprised. He called Latent, Kylie and Katie too. They all worriedly asked but I don't know from where to start.

After consoles, I told them everything I could say. They all became surprised and their expressions were horrifying. Clearly, they're all pitying me. I hugged them for the last time and made them promise to keep it among ourselves. I wish if Ellie would be here too. But she is on maternity leave. With tearful eyes, I signed all the papers and finally left the kitchen. Before leaving, I peeked into the big compound for the last time.

I worked here for less than a year but this place held memories for me. With Kylie, Katie and Latent, I enjoyed every moments but now I don't belong here anymore. I just lost my another home.

I cleared my eyes with a tissue. I don't want anymore unwanted curios look from any stranger. I stepped into the elevator with Mr Hyde. This elevator even seems a heaven now!

The elevator opened and Riley entered into there. My heartbeat skipped a bit and I know I can't control my emotions but I'm strong. I tried not to care but I can feel a lump in my throat. My head started aching badly. Riley didn’t noticed me. He is drowned in a file. His clothes are same and his hair is messy. But he seems fine. God knows where he spent the yesterday night.

I wanna badly hug him and cry out but I feel a huge distance between us. Surrendering to himself means losing my baby. And I can't give up on it. Riley finally closed the file and looked at me.

Our eyes met. He flinched. There's surprise in his eyes and curiosity. Maybe, it's my fault that I had expected a silt of pain. Is am I the one to cry my ass off?

There’s awkwardness prevailing with the downing elevator. Neither is talking. He is feeling uncomfortable around me! Wow! I couldn’t imagine we will have a day like this. The elevator opened and he stepped out. I can see he is walking without even looking back. I expected just a mere lookout but before this the elevator had closed.

He didn’t said anything. I had expected something for him. He might be running up to me and say sorry or just a lil whereabouts. Does he know I'm here for him in high fever? It doesn’t matter anymore to him. He doesn’t care about me. Everything has came to an end.

(Hey guys, the more it's going, the more it's turning dark. But you know, darkness reaches faster than light. So hope for the light and do tell how it was. #RileyAlaska)