I Don't Love You (pt.2)

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Everything was so beautiful
And vibrant

When he tried to kiss me.

But I pushed him away,
"No, Bert, this is wrong."

The gaze on his face was that of heartbreak.

Though he should have known,

He should have known,

I would have rejected him.

His breathing turned brisk,
And he tried to pull me in again
For another kiss.

I pulled back from his face,
"No, Bert, stop.
This is wrong.
Very very wrong.
Frank is my boyfriend and I love him.
Bert it's wrong to be intimate with someone you don't feel affection for, especially if you already have a lover."

He stared for a second,
"But Gerard, I did so much for you.
I bought you things,
I managed to get you to forgive me..."

I sighed,
"And that's where you're flawed, Bert.
Money cannot buy you love.
Money cannot by you happiness.
And you only think that because it is a part of your corrupted, vain character.

What you don't understand is that
Love should be something special.
Love shouldn't be easy.
And that's what's wrong with you.
You think you can find love,
Grasp it,
And cradle it,
And play it into something of your own.

But that's not how it works.

Bert you need to wait for love to find you.
Because as much as I like you as a friend,
I certainly do not love you."

I sipped cold air into my lungs.
I think I was done
Here.

I sat up,
I was going home,
To see my Frank,
But Bert pulled me back.

He locked eyes with me,
For one good second;
After he gave out a half-hearted laugh,

"you'll never understand how much I love you,"

His voice was so tremulous.

"Why don't you love me back? I did everything for you and you still don't care."

His voice trembled. He was on the verge of breakdown.

I didn't dare look at him.

"What can I do to make you love me? Huh? How can I be like Frank?"

He can't be like Frank.

Frank actually understands me. He knows what real love is.

And poor Bert is still learning.

It made him selfish.

I pity him so deeply,
But I didn't answer.

"You pathetic fucking piece of trash." be breathed.

His voice was getting hoarser and hoarser...

"You're so fucked up, it's blinded you."

And hoarser...

"You came close to me as if you actually loved me.
I can't fucking believe you.
You're rotten, Gerard."

I looked at him.

He sounded so aggrieved, but is face wasn't red.

That was what made me uneasy.

I was scared.

"You're like that spoiled fruit in the back of the cabinet that nobody cares about. You know why?
You're useless.
So fucking useless.
So fuck you, you abominable, piece of shit.

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