Getting back to "Normal" | Rhekker

Chapter 10- Deal

A knock came over Ava's door as she lay in bed reading a hospital magazine. Hopeful that it was Connor with some home possession she turned her head.
"Sorry to disappoint" Daniel said, letting himself into her room. The disappointment on her face must have been clear as day.
"How long is left in my hold?" Ava asked plainly.
"You know Dr. Bekker this would go by much faster if you cooperated with me" he told her, sitting down in the chair next to her bed.

Dropping her magazine to her lap, "I just want to get out of here Daniel"
"And what's your plan when you do get out of here Ava" he asked, setting a paper bag done on the table.
Ava exhaled, as much as she had been thinking about finally getting out of here, it never crossed her mind as to what she'd do after.
"I don't know, I might move back to Africa. Go to Egypt maybe, South Africa would be a last resort. Leave Chicago, that's for sure" she said sharply.
"And why would you leave Chicago"
Ava gave him a look, "stop trying to therapies me Daniel"
Daniel shifted in his seat, "I think it would be beneficial if you stopped thinking of this as therapy and more like a Conversation"
"But it is therapy" she reminded him.
"Yes, I am a psychiatrist, but I am also your friend and colleague Ava, you can talk to me" he assured her.
Ava offered no reply and so he continued, "I'm sure your well aware of the rules of a psych hold, no sharp objects. But" Daniel said before rooting around in his bag. "If you open up, even just a bit, and answer some of my questions. I will let you shave your legs, with supervision obviously"
Ava looked at the safety razor in Daniels hand and the shaving cream in the bag. Let's be honest this was probably the closet Ava would get to feeling like herself again for a while.

"Arnt you afraid I'll try run or do something crazy?" She probed.
"No, Ava. How can you trust me if I don't trust you?"
Ava looked deep into his eyes, trying to see if this was some sort of trick.
"Okey" she agreed shortly, holding up her wrist for him. He slotted the little key into the handcuffs and released her with a click.
Daniel brought a second chair in and dragged it into Ava's bathroom. Ava took off her scrub bottoms and folded them. Since Ava had no one to bring her clothes from home, her spare pair of scrub bottoms was the closest luxury she had. Sitting in her boxer shorts Ava could feel the cold of the plastic chair under her. Daniel handed her the safety razor and shaving cream and Ava ran the water from the tap, setting the blade.
"Why don't you wish to return to South Africa?" Daniel asked as Ava smeared some foam up her leg. Resting her ankle up on the sink Ava took her first stroke.
"I've got nothing there for me, it would only ever be a last resort kind of thing" Ava sighed, rinsing her blade.

"What about family, friends?"
"My dad died of a heart attack, I haven't spoken to by biological dad in years, and my mother drowned when I was eight" Ava said flatly, as if she was reading the weather for the day.
"I'm sorry for your loss Ava" Dr. Charles said.
Ava stayed focused on her right leg, breathing in the scent of the shaving cream, taking long strokes in the direction of her hair.
"Do you have any friends in Chicago?"
Ava shook her head, "I had a few friends over in east mercy, but we haven't seen each other in a few years. I've pulled back a bit from others, haven't really felt like socialising much in the past few months"
"Ava have you felt depressed in the last several months"
Ava stopped her stokes but stayed focused on her leg, "No" she said, slowly moving the razor again. "I've just been a bit tried, and down, That's all. Not really having the Energy to do much after work, I've been so busy" she defended. 

Charles nodded, "And how is what you described different to depression"
Ava pursed her lips, looking around the bathroom. "This place reminds me a lot of the army. Everyone can see you shower and you can't leave" she joked playfully getting back to her work. Daniel smiled lightly at her remark. "What was your time like with the army?"
"Fine, for the most part. I was just doing humanitarian work after big conflicts, providing medical care" Ava explained.
The room was quite except for the hiss of Ava's razor cutting her hair, and the water washing the foam off her blade.

"I am aware of yours and Dr. Rhodes relationship" Daniel disclosed. Ava turned her head, not wanting to meet his eye. "Dr. Rhodes disclosed it to me after an interview with PD"
Ava seemed to shrink into her chair, trying to make herself smaller. "So everyone knows then" she sighed,
"Ava Bekker got her heart broken and couldn't handle some name calling so she tried to end it all" Ava said bitterly, tears rimming her eyes. She threw her gaze to the floor, away from Daniel.
"Dr. Bekker why do you do that, turn away and hide when you feel certain emotions" Daniel pointes our.
"My work is coordinated and tactical, not emotional" she told him in a harsh gasp, try in to calm her breath.
"Ava you are still allowed to have emotions" he told her.

Ava ignored his comment and continued her work, moving onto her other leg.
"I never understood why shaving legs was a common practice"
"It was a marketing scheme started by Gillette in the 30's" Ava said into her leg.
"I stated doing it for competitions, make me swim faster"
Daniel wrote that down into his little note book resting on his thigh.
"Do you still swim?"
Ava pulled her face away from her leg, sighing, "Not as much as I used to. Haven't had the time or energy"

"After the death of Doctor Wheeler" Daniel started. Ava let out a little jerk in her arm, she had been running the blade over her knee cap and nicked the skin.
"I didn't do that on purpose, I swear" she defeated, not wanting to have to stay here longer.
"It's okey, Ava. I believe you" he comforted her, handing her a tissue for her knee.
"I promised myself this would never happen again at Gaffney. I'm sorry for not seeing the signs in you sooner" Daniel gave her a somber look, that she was proof of his failed attempts to help his colleagues.
Ava finished shaving her legs in silence, no longer under the quick fire of Daniel's questions. She kept both ankles up on the sink when she was done, resting her cheek against her thighs in the comfortable silence.
Ava lifted her head up, hearing footsteps in her room. "Ava?"
"In here Connor" Ava called out to him.
Connor walked into the bathroom, visibly puzzled by the scene before him.

"Dr. Bekker and I were just having a chat between friends" Dr. Charles explains, getting up in from his chair.
"I hope to see you again soon, Ava" he tells her before leaving. Connor watched him leave before turning back to Ava.
"Do all of your friendly chats end with your trousers off?" He questioned.

Ava rolled her eyes, pulling her legs down from the sink. She unfolded her trousers from the back of her chair and slipped them on.
"I was shaving my legs" she informs him, "in exchange for Daniels twenty questions"
Ava breezed past him into her room, wrapping her arms protectively around herself.
"I eh, I brought you some clothes, and things from home. Tea, as-well" Connor told her nervously, rooting through the bag. Ava watched him from her bed, her knees pulled up to her chest.
"You still have two weeks so I brought you different clothes for the different days, a blanket. And some shorts as well, in case in gets warm, since you can't open the windows" he said quickly.
Ava gets up to stand in front of Connor.
"And then I made sure everything was up to code, since you aren't allowed drawstrings or wire bras. So I couldn't bring your favourite lounge set but I got the teal one that you like and I had to pack you a sports bra since all your other ones had wires. I thought the tea would help you relax and-" Connor rambles.
"Connor" she says softly, placing a hand on top of his holding the bag, drawing him out of his spiraling.
"Thank you" she said sincerely.
Connor exhaled through his nose and visibly relaxed. Suddenly her dropped the bag, grasping Ava by her arms her pulled her into his chest. Ava tensed under his embraced, having not expected it, but relaxed a little, placing her hands awkwardly on his waist.