Ratchet: You haven't explained the diseases you humans can get.
June: You want to know?
Ratchet: Uh- Yeah? That was the whole point?
June: and here I was, thinking you actually cared about me.
Ratchet: I want to know, are you going to tell me or not? I still have work to do-
June: I was right! There is no pleasing you.
Optimus: Who's pleasing who?
Ratchet: *cringes* Please never say that again.
Optimus: Why?
June: Optimus, can you tell Ratchet he's being an emotionless aft?
Optimus: ... what happened.
Ratchet: I just want to know about Human diseases.
Optimus: Sounds interesting.
June: I'll tell you then! Seeing as you don't have the emotional range of a pen.
Ratchet: Why you-
Optimus: That sounds interesting.
Ratchet: He's repeated his compliment, that's Optimus for 'I don't care or want to care but I'm too polite to say so.'
Optimus: ...
June: Oh...
June: Nevermind.
June: Ratchet?
Ratchet: What.
June: Illness is caused by Pathogens. These are microorganisms.
Ratchet: *silently celebrating*
June: There are four types, Fungi, Bacteria, Viruses, and Protists.
Ratchet: *shivers* We get viruses.
June: These Pathogens have a short life cycle, they infect, reproduce, and die.
Ratchet: Thrilling.
June: The diseases caused by Pathogens are Communicable Diseases. That means they can be transferred from one person to another.
Ratchet: Like... Corna Virus?
June: Corona.
Ratchet: Crona?
June: No, CO-RO-NA
Ratchet: Corena.
June: Sure.
June: These can be transferred in multiple different ways: Air, Water, Touch, Undercooked Food, Animals-
Ratchet: *nods knowingly* Energon.
Optimus: *visibly shudders from where he's stood*
Ratchet: Oh, yeah. Sorry Optimus.
Optimus: Hm? I do not know what you are talking about?
Ratchet: *leans over* that's Optimus for 'I'm severely traumatised and embarrassed from that situation. Please shut up.'
June: ... right.
June: Anyway, some diseases are genetic. Meaning that-
Ratchet: Humans are born with them!
June: Mhm, This usually means a abnormality in the DNA.
Ratchet: I once knew a guy with messed up DNA. He died.
June: ... oh.
Ratchet: Not from the Disease, he got shot in the head during Crystal Cities invasion. Sad day.
June: ... I don't know how to respond to that...
Ratchet: Then don't! That's what I do!
Optimus: That's Ratchet for 'I'm severely traumatised from this situation which is why I act mean and ignorant'.
June: *shocked*
Ratchet: *grumbles* Alright then, tell her everything about me.
Optimus: *smiles*
June: Ok I'm just going to go-
Ratchet: Good, I need to phsycologically recover from Optimus using sarcasm infront of a human.
Optimus: Hm? No I was not joking.
Ratchet: *hissing* this is your cue to SHUT UP
June: OKBYE
*leaves*
I'm leaving for my Bio exam so no more Ratchet and June :( Anyway I hope you suffered while reading that :D
YOU ARE READING
Unfunny Tfp Oneshots/Bloopers
Humor[SLOW/NO UPDATES] Just a cringe but (hopefully) funny oneshot book I started when I was 11! Contents: -Weirdness -Gayness -Idiocy -Memes -and the author being a geek If anyone has any requests I'll take them! ~~I really need inspiration please~~
