Unfunny Tfp Oneshots/Bloopers

The Sad Tale of Percival (Part One)

Unlike popular opinion, Soundwave wasn't actually mean and careless. This seemed to be an unforgiving pattern in his life, people judging him for his outward behaviour and creating rumours that slowly knocked the spy into an evil, emotionless stereotype until all anyone could even describe him as was a literal robot.
As you may have guessed, that was not true. Soundwave was many things: quiet, cold, a mech with questionable morals, and perhaps a little intimidating. If there was one thing he wasn't however, it would be emotionless.

"Soundwave, report!" Megatrons' snarling tone echoed over the commlink, demanding as always.
Soundwave didn't move from his position as he stood at the computers in the control room, instead choosing to roll his optics and send a link to Megatron. He waited a few seconds before Megatron contacted him again;
"...yes, I am aware that Starscream, Dreadwing, and Shockwave are all currently incapacitated in the medical bay. I was... simply checking that your search for Energon was... going well?"
The last few words were phrased as a question, as if Megatron wasn't sure why he was checking on Soundwave either.
"Well, all seems to be... um... well, so... keep up the work."

Well that was weird.

Soundwave merely rolled his optics again and returned to his work, not bothering to wonder why Megatron was acting so strangely. It only took a few minutes before Megatron contacted him once again, much to the annoyance of the silent mech.
"Ah, Soundwave. I was hoping you could provide an update for-"
The blissful sound of an Energon mine discovery, (in the Decepticons case, a Vehicon cheering loudly and shouting that he had found Energon) interrupted the awkward conversation Megatron was likely about to embarrass himself with.
"Soundwave, open a groundbridge to the coordinates and send..."
Megatron paused, clearly trying to think of a person with even the slightest ability to lead a mission that wasn't currently in the medbay from their own idiotic behaviour.
"Soundwave... could you, ah, lead the mining group and strip the mine?"
"Yes my leige." Soundwave replied, almost sarcastically playing Knockouts voice back to the Warlord.

Without waiting for an answer he turned and began generating a groundbridge, almost smiling as the familiar energy rush flooded through him. The extraction team were already in the control room, buzzing and chattering. They fell silent when they saw who was leading them.
"Him? Seriously?" One vehicon whispered.
"But he's cold, careless, AND emotionless!" Another whispered back, very loudly and sounding like a complete and utter idiot that belongs in A Series of Unfortunate Events.
Soundwave restrained himself from facepalming and gestured towards the bridge. With an aura of unhappiness, the team left.
Soundwave didn't look back at the rest of the drones working in the control room as he walked out.

-----

If there was one thing that Soundwave hated, it would be doing nothing. The extreme workload that the mech was forced to deal with every day meant that when there was nothing for him to work on or think about, Soundwave was prone to extreme boredom. Standing and watching mindless drones cut energon crystals from a mine was one of these 'doing nothing' moments.
Every so often, a drone or two would come close enough that Soundwave could hear their conversation:
"Primus this sucks."
"I know right? My arms burn so badly right now."
"I guess that our rations will be increased now that we have more energon?"
"Probably not, Lord Megatron probably will give it all to the stupid command officers-"
The Vehicon had looked at Soundwave with an abject sense of horror at that, which had been momentarily amusing.
"Do you think he heard that?"
"I don't know... let's mine somewhere else. Just in case?"
And then Soundwaves entertainment dissapeared back into the mine.
Back to boredom.