Unfunny Tfp Oneshots/Bloopers

Headcanons but it's 1:52am

I'm so tired that I'm barely functioning

A lot of Cybertronians are made of a mixture of metals, like some are made with Steel and others are made with Iron then there's ones with a mixture.
The problem? This means that some of them are magnetic.
Let's just say a few of the cons learnt the hard way that they stick to fridges.
I like to imagine that even in holoform they're slightly magnetic so when Bee visits Raf he leans against the fridge and has to actually make an effort to get unstuck.

Idk if this is canon but the vehicons and eradicons don't actually have energon, they're literally just robots.
Which is why they don't bleed everywhere during fights like you'd expect.
The fights with the actual Cons are much more gory obviously.

Soundwave zones out whenever anybody rants to him, which means he just stares off somewhere.
On one occasion, this was into the hallway.
The hallway the Autobots were using to sneak along the Nemesis.
They promptly had a Oh slag moment before having a wtf moment when Soundwave literally doesn't react. Screamer is also pacing around in front of him being dramatic which makes it even funnier. They end up getting away without him noticing.
You'd think he'd be more attentative after that.
He wasn't.

When Wheeljack and Bulkhead became friends, it was on purpose and really sudden:

Bulkhead: Hey newbie, wanna be wrecking buddies?
Wheeljack: Eh, why not.
Bulkhead: Nice. So uh, what's-
Wheeljack: I don't do that small talk awkward stage slag.
Bulkhead: Ah sick, so-
Wheeljack: I'm gonna go draw spikes on the tactic presentation board, c'mon.
Bulkhead: That's genius, I just-
Wheeljack: WAIT!
Bulkhead: ...
Wheeljack: [insert evil face] You draw spikes, I'll draw the commanders as femmes. And us kissing so nobody suspects us. Wanna pose for reference?
Bulkhead: I'm so down for that but I literally just wanted to ask you what your name was, PRIMUS

And just like that, besties for life.

(This is also surprisingly similar to how Ratchet and Orion Pax became friends)

Everyone makes fun of Raf being short, all the way until he had his growth spurt and ended up being so freakishly tall that even Ultra Magnus (tallest in holoform) had to admit he was no longer a tiny child.

The Autobots are all SUCH Ipad kids.
All you need to do to distract them is put anything onto a screen and they're basically oblivious.
This actually worked during a time where Ultra Magnus and Wheeljack were almost physically brawling and June put on Paw Patrol on the TV and they both sat on the sofa as far away from each other as possible and actually watched it.

Drinking Energon and Blood Energon isn't the same thing.
Energon has many levels of purity, the clearer the Energon, the purer (like water).
On Cybertron, Energon was usually translucent and sky blue as it was pure. This may change in where you are on Cybertron.
However, Cybertronians need a purifier to make Energon drinkable/ convert the non-edible and toxic crystals into what they can have.
As there's a war going on, the purifiers both teams have are very bad and doesn't work too well which is why their drinking Energon looks like their blood Energon.
This is also the reason they are always so low on Energon is because they are forced to drink more to get the nutrients they need as the less purified it is, the less good it does for you.

Energon Crystals will usually kill a person if ingested, the lethality decreases the purer it gets.
Blood Energon is on the lower end of the purity scale which is what separates Vampires from Cybertronians.

The Autobots don't need to blink in bot form so when they turn on their holoforms they forget to blink.
It gets really creepy sometimes,
especially when aftholes like Wheeljack find it funny to scare the shit out of people.