Unfunny Tfp Oneshots/Bloopers

When did I make this-

Good Luck getting through this.
I actually don't know when I made this

So Optimus pretty much has the paint job of a teenage girl in booty shorts and crop tops. He also has those awesome boots.
But cause he's a soft boi he has cropped sweaters that everyone seems to have.
YES thats why his arms are red :>
soft thot

Ratchet also steals his sweaters but not the cropped ones cause he's a coward.
Ratchet wears Just A Christmas Sweater Because He Doesnt Know How To Dress Up Like The Others- underneath a lab coat and refuses to wear anything else even though it's like 90 degrees.

“Aren’t you hot?”
“No that’s why I’m wearing the sweater.”
“iT IS ALMOST 100 DEGREES F OUTSIDE"

The kids walk in on him trying on a cropped sweater one day AND THEY'RE JUST "whatcha dooooin" AND HE FREAKS THE FKCU OUT
Then Optimus later

Optimus: What Are You Doing?

Ratchet: SURPRISED HIGH PITCH SCREAMS

Everyone has worn an Optimus sweater at some point
Even Agent Fowler has accidentally worn one.
June comes to pick up Jack in a massive sweater.

Wheeljack wearing cowboy boots with spurs and everything.
He's a cowboy in a cowboy suit.
A thotty cowboy????

Wheeljack: I Mean- It Looks Good On Me But Why Am I Wearing A Cowboy Outfit?

Ratchet: ...no reason-

Bulkhead’s a gym rat (Breakdown and him are gym rivals!!!) so like he probably also wears athletic wear.
Athletic wear and Noodle Goggles (cause he feels left out)

So Wheeljacks a cowboy but BOI is Arcee a pirate
A hot pirate.
She could stab you a million times while being hot.
She has a massive pirates hat that she stole from Ultra Magnus.
Which means that Ultra Magnus is a pirate.
They both wear Optimus sweaters.

Bumblebee wearing those big puffy skirts with all the petticoats under and whenever he sits it makes a “fwoomph” sound and he always has a cushion.
Makes Bee tol enough to kiss his bf Smokescreen when he sits in his lap.

Wheeljack has a mullet.
Not a redneck mullet, but an alt mullet.

Optimus in a fedora.
Optimus: tips fedora M’egatron
Smokescreen in a fedora.

Miko asking Wheeljack to braid her hair and he does it expertly

Ratchet has long hair that's always in a braid, Wheeljack usually does the braid, HE'S REALLY BAD AT BRAIDING HAIR, but ratchet doesn't wanna hurt his feelings so he wears messy tangled braids all the time.

But we're talking about the Bots here what about STARSCREAM

What Would Starscream Wear?
The Virginity killing sweater
He has heels.
But he can proper walk in them.
Like, Knockout is jealous.

And Knockout has an Optimus sweater, cause Megatron got one somehow. And the vehicons have Optimus sweaters.
(he has a lot of sweaters)

Megatron has a strawberry dress and a load of pencil skirts with slits in the side to show of THEM THIGHS.

Shockwave has a red sparkly dress.
Illogical.

They work at femboy Hooters.
What is Hooters?
A resteraunt
Which is centred around the idea of degrading women
Burn it

humanformers au, where everything is the same, except that optimus and megatron are strippers, and the only war going on is fighting on who’s the better stripper

OPTIMUS WHAT HIS FCUGING SNATCHED WAIST TEACH ME YOUR SECRETS BITCH HOW TO BE SO HOT
IT'S THE CORSET

Optimus: is quite literally Cybertron's Jesus
Also Optimus: dresses like a thot and doesn't even care

HOTTERY THOTTERY

Look at this thot

Autothots roll out.

Simp

soft thot

knockout totally wears crop tops
Sass queen

AUTOTHOTS ROLL OUT-

AUTOTHOTS ROLL OUT-

I Share A Single Braincell With Starscream