Unfunny Tfp Oneshots/Bloopers

Even More Headcanons

Scarring Headcanons cuz why not: (in holforms)

-Soundwave has electrical scars down his arms and stuff
-Wheeljack has scars from trying to tattoo himself during all that time in space
-Knockout has a surprisingly large amount of scars that are in graze patterns all over him
-Bumblebee doesn't have any facial or neck scars, instead he has a deep one across his upper chest
-Starscream has a terrifying amount of scars everywhere (there are less on his face)
-Bulkhead has serious scars on his back from where he got shot and he's very self conscious about it

Shockwave and Soundwave are related in some way (I always headcanoned brothers in this situation) and they had a baby brother (Guess who) but they didn't want him to grow up with the cons or become evil like they did so they just left him on the Autobots doorstep and the kid grew up helping people and eventually became a rescue bot AKA Heatwave

When they were in school everyone expects Ratchet or Megatron to be rude and Wheeljack to break all the rules, whenever something gets broken in class Jackie gets detention. If theres an argument people immedietly blame Ratchet.
But no
In fact, Orion is the sneakiest little glitch in the whole school. He breaks tables and gets away with it. His disses and rapping are known throughout the whole school. He pranks someone every other day and pretends he doesn't know anything about it with his innocent act.
And with that in mind, Ratchet and Wheeljack are the biggest nerds in all of history.
And that's how small precious Orion gained his reputation as No.1 Slagger.

And if you look close enough you can still see it in Optimus.
That machine Bulkhead must have tripped over? Optimus.
That prank everyone assumed Smokescreen set up? Optimus
That smoke bomb that blew up in Ratchets face that Wheeljack was almost killed for? You guessed it. Optimus (R.i.p Wheeljack)

And even after all those years Optimus still gets away with being a sneaky glitch.

None of the bots can actually write.
They can type and read but they can't write because handwriting isn't a thing on cybertron.
The kids realise this after trying to get Optimus to sign a peice of paper and he doesn't know how to hold a pen.
Also Smokescreen has Dyslexia

Miko is one of the twelve primes and she became human to hang out because Primus punished her or whatever and she got picked up by Team Prime and now she constantly annoys her little brother as anonymously as she can

Everyone expects Orion Pax to be the nice innocent child of the friend group but when a Relic turns him into a teenager he is the most "Evil, bad-mouthed, emo, rebel, 'I pierce myself with safety pins for no reason'" kid ever and actively listens to music that makes even Miko horrified and everyone but Ratchet don't know how to handle it.

The same happens to Wheeljack one dayand everyone is terrified about what is going to happen and they see him and he's literally Raf but Engineering instead of Computers and they never let him live it down that he was a nerd as a child

Ok, buckle up for this dumping ground of a chapter

-Wheeljack is actually really smart and is the person who actually does all the groundbridge maintenance

-Raf and Soundwave regularly play chess online and just don't say anything about it

-Bumblebee learnt how to roller blade and is now the fastest thing to ever exist.

-Human Ultra Magnus has long light blue hair and he wears it like an elf but he has no idea what an elf is.
-He also has those helmet jewel things braided into it too.

-Wheeljack wears gloves in his holoform cuz his hands are all scarred from bombs that blew up while he was defusing/making them

-Miko wears heelys and still manages to run in them #almostasimpressiveasScreamer

-Ultra Magnus was right (?) handed until he lost his servo and had to learn with the other hand

-Smokescreen and Ratchet are banned from gaming (sore losers lmao)

-Wheeljack is banned from picking movies on movie night (looks at Friday the 13th)

-The quickest way to die is pushing someone over in Freezing Statues.

-Bulkhead is actually quite academically smart just lacks Charisma and Street Smarts

(I can't remember wether I already posted this or not but leggo)

-

Ice Skating Headcanons cuz why not I've dumped loads of stupid stuff already

Orion would be amazing at it, Optimus not so much. He's top heavy and doesn't have the best balance due to it.

Ratchet is the parent that watches on the sideline and complains about the cold. And then he complains about other people complaining about the cold.

Ultra Magnus would be one of those overviewers that doesn't let you do tricks cuz it's 'too dangerous'

Arcee is pretty good but doesn't care for it much. When someone says she should be a figure skater because of her frame she shows them that her fighting skills haven't been affected by the ice.

Bulkhead can actually skate quite well but it terrified of knocking someone over or falling over. He goes around with those plastic penguins to make him feel better.

Bumblebee isn't just fast on wheels, what he lacks in tricks is made up in crazy speeds.

Smokescreen is the one kid thst spends 90% of the time on the floor, he spends the whole time trying to skate backwards and never does it correctly. He also gets in everyones way, something that made Bulkhead stop skating for a good 20 minutes and Arcee purposely run into him.

Wheeljack flexes on Smokescreen by skating backwards the whole time. He's pretty good at skating but refuses to tell anyone where he learnt to spin about or jump. He only spends like 20 minutes ice-skating.

Jack is pretty average.

Miko constantly tries to copy Wheeljack and gets upset when she can't pull the tricks off. Bulkhead pushes her around on a seat made for ice a lot.

Raf doesn't like Ice skating and prefers sitting out but he actually isn't half-bad at it.

Just casually posts a terrible chapter after 4 months.
Sorry about that by the way, I got COVID and then Writers block hit me like a truck (hooonk)