Sanegiyuu oneshots

It's alright, I'm here now

*Angst
*Depressed giyuu
* Tw: self harm, blood, sharp objects

Sanemi's pov:

Gosh, what is that annoying sound? I keep hearing this sniffling that sounds like someone is crying. It's probably giyuu, that weak little bitch. He's the only one here with me, and he is fucking crying. Great. Does he hate being with me that much? If he wants to cry, he can. But can't he cry elsewhere?? I'm trying to sleep and that fucker is annoying the shit outta me. Gosh that asshole. I let out a small grunt and turned my body away from the noise, clearly pissed off by whatever sound giyuu was making. If he hates being with me that much, can't he opt out of this mission? Why the fuck does he have to follow me? Oyakata-sama said it's okay for 1 person to do it alone but what the hell does he want to follow me??? I swear that prick is annoying as fuck.

3rd person's pov:

Sanemi continued to toss and turn, trying his best to sleep. The crying brunette paused. He saw sanemi's face twisted into an annoyed look and decided to go elsewhere. He slowly got up and shuffled his feet to the door. A small click can be heard as the brunette closed the door. The wind hashira let out a sigh of relief, he was finally able to sleep.

"Finally, that weak bitch is gone. Now I can fucking sleep" the angry boy muttered.

...

30 minutes has passed and sanemi is still not asleep. He kept tossing and turning in the futon, agitated by something. His mind can't stop thinking about the crying brunette, he kept wondering why giyuu was crying. Did he hate being with sanemi? If so, why? Why would he hate sanemi so much to the point he was crying? Those questions lived rent free in sanemi's head. He sat up and rubbed his eyes with his hands. He checked the time, groaning once he realised it was 1.30am. The two had a long hiking trip tomorrow and they needed a lot of rest. He exited the room, a soft click echoed in the corridors when sanemi closed the door. He entered the kitchen and got a cup that was on the counter. He poured some water, cringing as he sipped on the water. The water was tasted bad, the water jug was left out in the open for a while.

"A knife is missing" sanemi noted.

He found it unusual but simply shrugged it off, thinking giyuu had misplaced it or something. He took another sip of water, turned around and froze, concerned by the sight of the water hashira.

Seeing giyuu would be a little surprising since he didn't expect the latter to be there. But what was troubling was the fact that giyuu's white yukata was decorated with spots of red blood. His sleeves had small but evident red stains, his face had tear marks and he held the missing kitchen knife in his right hand.

"S-shinazugawa-san? What are you doing here?

".." sanemi didnt respond. He glanced down at the knife that was glistening under the moonlight.

"What are you doing with the knife?"

"What knife?" The latter replied without missing a beat. He quickly hid his hands behing his back, feigning innocence. The younger of the two forced a quick smile, his pale lips trembled, fearing he got caught.

Sanemi clicked his tongue and rolled his eyes. He was going to ignore giyuu and deal with this shit tomorrow since he needed sleep, but something clicked inside his head. He slammed his cup down, stomped to giyuu and ripped the knife out of giyuu's hand before dragging him to the room they shared together. Sanemi's heart clenched, hoping that his assumptions were wrong. The knife, the tear stricken face and the blood staining the yukata were telltale signs of self harm. Sanemi slammed the door open and threw giyuu to the ground. He opened the drawers in search of first aid supplies.

"Wait, shinazugawa-san, what are you doi-"

"Shut it. Don't say anything and just sit your ass there" he growled back.

Giyuu obeyed, sitting there dumbfounded. Sanemi found the first aid supplies, he sat infront of giyuu and grabbed the brunette's arm. Giyuu winced in pain and immediately retracted his arm.

"Wait-"

"Give me your arm"

"Wait, hold on a minute-"

"Just give it to me" sanemi demanded, staring at giyuu. Giyuu let out an unsteady breath and reluctantly stretched out his arm. Sanemi grabbed it, rolled up giyuu's sleve and started treating giyuu's cuts. Giyuu bit his bottom lip, trying to suppress his tears. He was found out by sanemi.

"Your other arm" sanemi spoke, breaking the silence. Giyuu silently extended his other arm. Sanemi rolled up giyuu's sleve and sucked in a breath, the cuts in giyuu's right arm was deeper than his left. Giyuu winced in pain as sanemi treated his cuts.

...

"Why"

"Huh?"

"Why did you do this"

".." giyuu said nothing, he just stared at the ground. He didn't how to reply sanemi's question. What was he to say? He was depressed? He would just be called pathetic. Giyuu bit his lips harder, drawing blood.

Sanemi finished treating the wounds, he cleaned the mess and sat Infront of giyuu. Awkward silence filled the room, neither knew what to say. All of a sudden, sanemi pulled giyuu onto his lap. He embraced the depressed brunette and rubbed circles into the latter's back.

"What-"

"Its okay, you can cry. I won't ask you why or anything else. You can just cry"

Giyuu stared at the wall, he bit the insides of his cheek. Tears were spilling out, he didn't want to embarrass himself, definitely not infront of his colleague. He tried his best to not cry, but his efforts were futile. The warmth which embraced him and sanemi's words opened a dam. Giyuu couldn't hold back his tears anymore, he was exhausted, tired of pretending he was okay. He wanted to die, he couldnt deal with the pain anymore. How was he supposed to live when his friend and sister has died for him? He was a useless being, someone who wasnt even worthy of being a hashira. Shinobu was right, no one liked him. The pain he desparately tried to bury was resurfacing. Giyuu sobbed, the amount of shit and pain he had to deal with for years was evident in his cries. The sound of his sobs were heartbreaking. Just what hell has this man gone through?

Sanemi silently listened to giyuu's cries. He continued to rub circles on giyuu's back and hugged giyuu tighter. A tear rolled down his cheek as he heard his colleague's heart wrenching cries. He whispered,

"Its alright, I'm here now"

-------------------------------------------------------

I choose violence :)

Just know that Self harm isn't the way to deal with shit. If shit is really bad, trying writing it down, self harm will do nothing but only damage to your body, it won't deal with the shit and yea. (⁠'⁠；⁠ω⁠；⁠｀⁠) I hope you have a really nice day today and if you arent doing well, just know that your happy days will be coming. No one in this world is destined to be sad forever. The world is fair, if one person is suffering forever, everyone will suffer. I know things might not be going well now but I can assure you, you are an important human, if you are suddenly gone from this world, the people who care for you will be heartbroken. I promise you that your days will definitely get better, so please live on okay <3 continue fighting <333

Oh whelp (⁠'⁠；⁠ω⁠；⁠｀⁠). Im thinking of writing a smut soon :3 if you have any recommendations, pls tell me (⁠╥⁠﹏⁠╥⁠).