The Queen & I (GxG)

Chapter 64 : Off The Market

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"So what's the biggest lesson that you think you have learned these past couple of years?"

"Sounds like a pageant question". JT hushed passing the plate of pancakes to me. "Gamit na gamit".

"Oo nga. Bakit feeling ko hindi pa ako retired sa pageantry?" Tiningnan ko si nang MJ who shrugged and squeezed a dollop of maple syrup on my breakfast.

"Ang KJ niyo naman. Alam niyo ba na hindi mo masasabi na beauty queen ka kung hindi mo dinaanan itong question na'to? Minsan ka na nga lang nandito, nang-veto ka pa ng question".

"Sorry". Janine laughed.

Sa bagay, tama si nang MJ — hindi complete ang pageant kung walang question that revolves around what you've learned in life — your own journey.

"But it's a good question". Janine stressed the importance of the common, but substantial query.

"Kaya nga gusto ko rin itanong yan sa mga tao—of course, now and then, diba — we get to reflect what went on in our lives during the past years, especially New Year na. Yung mga what we are grateful for and mga bagay na gusto niyo baguhin sa sarili niyo. Para rin malaman ng mga viewers yung take natin — malay mo, your answers can serve as an inspiration pala diba?"

I nodded and thought about how far I've transformed into somebody who had a different mindset a couple of years back.

"Siguro nang, yung learning how to listen and forgiving not just yourself, but the people who have hurt you — mas magaan and mas nakaka-move forward ka ng maayos kung wala kang hatred sa puso saka sa buhay".

"May hugot ka ba? MJ snickered but smiled afterwards.

"Kasi diba, sometimes we rely too much on ano yung alam lang natin, or kung ano lang yung feeling natin that we tend to become bias on our point of view lang — hindi ko sinasabi na i-invalidate yung own feelings natin o yung mga kutob-kutob, ha — what I mean is, if you're in the middle of an argument or misunderstanding with someone who's really important to you, it's very important to not come into conclusions agad especially when you're upset or what — alam mo ito nang, emotions are very powerful like kung may galit tayo, it's so easy for us to make judgements and put out words that could end beautiful relationships with our family, friends—"

"—lovers". Biglang siningit ni ate Janine.

"Hoy!" MJ clapped and giggled. "Lovers talaga, mare!"

"But it's true, right? Like what Rab was saying, it also applies to lovers, partners, asawa — and I think, admittedly, that's one aspect that I have to work on, because I end up sticking to what I think lang like, I don't listen to what my partner is trying to say between the lines".

"Gusto mo kasi laging ikaw yung nasusunod, ganoon?"

"Yes, like that. Eh paana naman kasi kung ako yung laging tama?" Janine snickered.

Tumahimik na lang ako, but deep inside I was giggling. In a way medyo, ganoon din naman ako. Gusto ko naman talaga ako yung nasusunod.

"Pero iba rin kasi kung marunong ka makinig before making a decision. And it's important to just let go and forgive whatever happened in the past. But! But! — of course, it doesn't mean that you will forget if there's actually a mistake, especially if the mistake needs to be corrected".

"Mahirap din kasi mag pa-abuse, diba? Like let's say yung ex mo habol ng habol sa iyo tapos wala namang pagbabago...", MJ drank a cup of coffee that she got beside my plate.

"I think pag may naghahabol, I'll just be wasting my time. May nag-habol na ba sa inyo na ganoon?" Ate Janine looked at us.

"So far sa akin wala. Mababait naman kasi mga ex ko", nang MJ bragged.