I'm writing this as I wait for my shower to warm up. It's been too long since we actually did this. My phone even offloaded the app so I guess that's a testament to how long it's been. I guess your notes are the new era of wattpads. I just don't have enough to say these days I guess. I think this will be more stream of consciousness.
Maybe I'm being silly and maybe I'm being emotional because I'm about to get my period but it really fucking sucks that we are "divorcing" or whatever. It kills me that we barely talk and most of the time it feels like my fault anyway. And I know you're busy and you have a completely new cast of characters that I just kind of awkwardly fit into and that's not your fault or mine it's just how it is but it sucks. I don't want us to stop talking. I don't want us to just barely surface level talk. I want us to stay best friends. This probably is so whiny and sounds so baby but I just need to say it. This is like the most exciting time of our lives and it wouldn't be the same if we weren't talking. And I know I'm probably whining about an issue that's my own fault but I don't know. I just worry about it so much and you mention max and josh asking about it and it's just weird. I don't want to be weird to you and it's weird that I even feel weird. I'm happy you have friends that are so similar to you and I'm happy you're going out and being with them. I just miss you I guess. It's probably my own fault but still. This is actually so embarrassing I don't even want you to read this. This is stupid and i am stupid. I'm sorry and I love you.
