New Beginnings (Sequel to: It's Complicated)

Chapter 37: Depression

Shawna's POV

Scooter hugged me as I felt my entire world fall apart.

"Don't say it," I sobbed. "I don't want to hear it."

"Shawna I'm so sorry," he said.

I gasped and opened my eyes, I was in the waiting room.

"Shawna," Scooter said. "It's okay, are you okay?"

I hugged Scooter and started to cry, "is he gone?"

"No sweetie," he said. "They just said he's doing okay. He's a little weak but they've got a few more hours left on the surgery."

I felt very little relief, but at least he's still here. I sat impatiently. Scooter brought me food but I had no appetite. I couldn't sleep. I just sat looking out the window.

"Shawna?" Scooter said.

"Yeah?" I said, without taking my eyes off of the little flowers growing outside.

"Look at me," he said.

I did as he said.

"He's going to be okay."

I looked back outside. Scooter left and came back a few minutes later with a crying Pattie. I stood up and hugged her.

"I'm so sorry," I said to her. "I am so so sorry."

"Shawna it's not your fault, we just gotta stay positive!"

We sat down and talked for a little while. A nurse came out to talk to us, a disappointed look was on her face.

"There's been some difficulties," she said.

"What difficulties?" I stood up.

"His heart stopped and he went into cardiac arrest on the table, so we opened him up for surgery on his heart and he's getting really weak."

"YOU HAVE TO SAVE HIM!" I screamed as tears went down my cheeks. I didn't care if people were staring. "HES MY ENTIRE LIFE AND YOU PEOPLE DONT UNDERSTAND THAT!" I felt Scooter's hand on my shoulder.

"DO EVERYTHING YOU CAN TO SAVE HIM!"

The nurse nodded and left. I sat down, my crying was uncontrollable and I couldn't breathe. I held my chest as my heart ached and I fell to the floor. Scooter tried to calm me down but I blacked out.

When I fluttered my heavy eyes open I had an oxygen mask over my face and I was in a bed. Scooter said at the edge of the bed, his head down. I took the oxygen mask off and sat up. Scooter looked at me and gave me a weak smile.

"Please tell me he's okay," I said.

Scooter didn't speak.

"PLEASE TELL ME MY BABY IS ALIVE," I shouted.

"Shawna he's in surgery still, he's not looking too good."

I covered my face, it's never ending. The pain. The not knowing if he's going to make it. I've never felt so sad and stressed before.

"I have to take you somewhere," Scooter said.

"Where?"

"The ledge," he said. "It seems like you really need to get away and just take time to yourself."

"I'll go," I said.

I put my normal clothes on. Scooter hugged me.

"I'll keep my phone off," I said. "I don't need anyone bugging me."

"Good girl," he said. "Just be careful."

"I'll be back later don't worry."

I got into my car and turned my phone off. I went to the ledge and sat on the hood of my car. I felt a small breeze and I looked down into the gorgeous LA waters. I laid down on my car and looked up into the now setting sky.