"Joon's Dia"

(Chapter 19: What Now?)

(Four weeks earlier)

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"No! I said no, Namjoon. There's no way we're going to allow you to date an older woman, who's not Korean, who has a child and who lives way across the world."

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I couldn't believe my ears. I was trying my utmost best to convince my parents of my love for Blue, but my father kept on arguing with me. 'What the hell happened?' Let's recap a bit:

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Straight from my US visit, I came back home to South Korea, feeling full and alive. Not only was my concert one of the biggest pay outs for the company but through my meetings, I managed to help organise for BTS's world tour. But it wasn't because of this that had me feeling so accomplished, I was finally in love with someone and she loved me too. Blue... I couldn't stop thinking about her and as soon as I touched down on my home ground I texted her that I had safely arrived at my home country. I was exhausted and could only message her when I was going to bed. It was late here in Korea so I decided to go early the next morning to my family's home to proclaim my love for the girl of my dreams. Big mistake.

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They all saw the Brazil concert and when I tried to kiss Blue on stage. My dad was furious. He kept going on about me being disrespectful and that I shouldn't have encouraged that kind of behaviour in public. My mom and my sister, thank God, were a little more understanding.

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"Look at him, Appa," my little sister, Kyung Min, pleaded with my father, "He's in love with her."

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But my father wouldn't hear any of it, "No. Namjoon, you need to stop this right now. No more interacting with this girl. You hear me?"

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I was standing still but feeling the ground moving. I couldn't agree with that but then I was never disobedient to my parents before. I was always a respectful child. I was standing in silence just staring at my family. I love them so much but asking me not to be with the woman I love, was just killing me inside. I felt the tears coming out and I knew this was going to be extremely tough.

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"Appa... I understand your concern and I have apologised for my behaviour both publicly and privately but you can't tell me who to love," and then they fell out of my eyes. I couldn't help but cry. "I'm in love with her and she loves me."

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But he spat out at me, "Of course she loves you. You're Kim Namjoon. I'm sure she's an ARMY. Didn't you say that they 'found' her at the show?"

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I was beginning to wonder if I made a mistake in telling them about what happened and my feelings for Blue. "It was never like that, Appa. Yes, she's an ARMY and they found her but she helped me without question. She agreed to a contract that was so terrible but she did it anyway to help me out. She's been nothing but kind, thoughtful, understanding and loving throughout."

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I couldn't tell them that she would put me in my place and tell me when I was wrong and tried to correct me. My dad's idea of men being the authority figure in the family won't see well to a modern woman being the one in control. His ideal woman was the one to stay at home and take care of the household and children. I really didn't know how he ended up with my mother. My Eomma was a bit of both. She was old schooled yet she was open to accepting new ideas. She was the one who worked with me to learn to speak English through the sitcom 'Friends'. That in itself was a modern way of thinking. I looked at my mom for help and she just stared at me. Finally she answered,