Dancing With The Devil || COMPLETED ✓

t h i r t y - t w o

AXEL

My heart started constricting in my chest. This is my imagination, right? Off course it is. Why would she come back to me and offer me her smile? Her beautiful smile.

I blinked, shifting my focus back to the windshield. I can't take this anymore. If I stay here for another second, I'd lose my mind. I shake my head and ignited the engine, holding my breath, I started driving the damn car.

I dared to look in the side mirror and still find her standing there. Why the fuck am I hallucinating?

Gripping the steering wheel tightly, I drove to the house.

I lit the cigarette and was about to bring it to my mouth when my mind started fucking with me. She's with him. Ayla is with someone else.

From where did the thought cross my mind that she'll wait for me? It's been ten years since I ruined everything between us, why would she wait for me?

I took out my phone and searched on Google for his name. I chuckled, confirming my doubt that he was the same person with whom she went on a date. And now, he's a fucking billionaire. He has everything to offer Ayla and make her happy. He's everything that I'm not.

He didn't despise the sweet taste of the cookies she made. He ate it as if it was the best thing he ever had. And I can't even swallow those down my throat. I can't even appreciate her efforts but he gets to enjoy them.

I closed my eyes and the images of him kissing her started invading my mind. I still don't know how I controlled my nerves from bursting at that moment. I wanted to slice his flesh from his body and give him the most painful death. I could've ripped his heart opened and hung him from the tree in the middle of the woods and then enjoyed every single second of vultures feeding on him. As they pull out his flesh, leaving him only into bones. Them digging into his eyes and......

No.

I'd shoot myself in the head if I get this urge to harm him ever again. Ayla's fond of him. If I hurt him then it'll hurt her and it'd put me into thousand deaths if I cause her even a single tear of sadness.

She's not mine. She chose him, he's the one to deserve him.

I already lost my chance the day she saw me killing my father. The horror in her eyes is still fresh in my mind. And today when she told me that I'm fucked up, I heard the truth in her voice. I'm not the one for her, I couldn't be.

But what am I supposed to do with this pain in my chest that's ready to consume me to destruction? And this thing in my head that feels like it'll split my head into two?

I clenched my jaw and opened my eyes only to stare at the cigarette in my hand. Without thinking twice, I rolled the sleeves of my shirt. Pressing the burning cigarette against my bare wrist, I couldn't help but laugh.

It feels good.

I lit a bunch of cigarettes together and burned them on my skin. Fuck, it really feels good.

More laughter bubbled up my throat. He was talking about their physical intimacy in front of me. He gets to touch her naked body, he gets to kiss her every morning, he gets to watch her blissful face when she comes, and he gets to share his feelings with her.

"Stop. Just fucking stop." I screamed, fisting my hair, and pulling it in frustration as my heart started beating at an abnormal rate. The sound of the pulse traveling through my body started ringing in my ear and for a split second, I thought of grabbing the gun and shooting myself straight to my heart so that it stops beating for her. Because it hurts. It's always going to hurt to know that I lost the girl who dared to care for a pathetic person like me. I lost her and it was always because of that motherfucker; my dear father.