Castles crumbling (Taylor Swift's little sister)

It's nice to have a friend (part 2)

Was Lou right? Had everything gotten so bad again that they were worried? Your mom was acting kind of weird too... but it was impossible, the mirror didn't lie. Should you step on the scales to make sure? Nonsense... maybe you had a mini blip, just a mini slip, nothing too bad.

Suddenly, your thoughts were interrupted by a teacher. One of your teachers.

- "Is everything alright Lizzie? Are you okay?" Ms. Carrie asked gently touching your shoulder.

You realized that there were tears streaming down your face and you were standing in the middle of the cafeteria. Had your teacher seen it all? You quickly wiped your tears away.

- "Yeah. I'm fine. Thank you" you said leaving as fast as you could.

The bell rang and you ran to your classroom. You had Spanish class. The Spanish teacher made 'random' groups for a workshop you were doing and announced that your group would consist of Lou, Erin and yourself. In any other given moment that would've been great: you loved working with your friends. But today was not the day after what just had happened with Lou. You both informed the teacher that Erin was absent, and he said that the two of you could work just fine. You awkwardly sat with Lou and started to work on the task. She acted as if nothing had happened and within 25 minutes you were done with the workshop, then she turned around and said that a friend from another classroom asked her to have lunch with her. You said that it was completely fine, and they you could have lunch with other friends too. You asked other friends from your classroom if you could have lunch with them and they happily agreed, but while you walked with them to the cafeteria you started feeling anxious about having to eat in front of others. You feared that they may judge you. A knot formed in your stomach, and you felt like you couldn't physically eat anything. You opted for having some vegetable and chicken soup, but only had two spoonsful of it before giving up. Everyone was so nice, and you felt included in the conversation, eventually you forgot that you were supposed to finish your lunch and just laughed with them until they were all finished. None of them commented on how little you had eaten.

That afternoon you came home and said nothing to your mom about what happened at school. You pretended that everything was fine and even went with her grocery shopping after eating your afternoon snack and working out. Although Andrea could tell that you were anxious. The next day Erin was back and told you that she was feeling a lot better and that was why she decided to come to school. When Lou was doing a favor to a teacher of handing out some papers, Erin turned to you:

- "Lizzie... I've spoken with Lou. She told me what happened yesterday. I wanted to tell you that I'm also worried. I want you to be okay" Erin said fidgeting with her fingers.

- "Erin... I'm sorry about yesterday. I'll talk to Lou too. But I'm fine. Really. Not everything is eating disorder related. I've got everything under control" you replied.

- "I don't know Liz. I agree with Lou: I don't think that you've got this under control. And I do think that this is eating disorder related" she said shrugging.

You had to finish the conversation because the class resumed. Before recess, you told your friends that Ms. Carrie asked you to talk to her during the recess, which was true, and you said that you were going to eat after talking to her. You were terrified of what Ms. Carrie could say to you, you wondered how much of the fight with Lou she had seen and wondered if she wanted to talk to you about it. You wanted to make and excuse and not talk to her, but you couldn't do that. You were a good girl, you needed to go where your teachers asked you to. When recess time came you went to the teachers' lounge to look for Ms. Carrie.

- "Hey Lizzie, how are you?" She said.

- "I'm good. What about you Ms. Carrie?"

- "I'm glad to know that. I'm fine too" she said, and you awkwardly smiled at her. Then she continued: - "I won't talk about what happened yesterday at the cafeteria, although I wanted to tell you that I'm here if you ever need someone to talk to. I just wanted to ask you to help me with this philosophy event we have next week. Our school is hosting it and delegates from various schools around the world are coming. I wondered if you'd like to write and read an essay"