Castles crumbling (Taylor Swift's little sister)

Chapter 45

On Monday you woke up after crying yourself to sleep on Sunday night, post packing and getting all your belongings ready to go to the specialized clinic. You weren't talking much, neither crying. When you went downstairs you saw your mom and Taylor making breakfast for the three of you. They saw how tired you looked, your swollen, puffy and red eyes that suggested you've been crying lots. Their heart broke, but they knew that since having that conversation on Friday night with Tree, they needed to be stricter, and that tough love was the best way to help you recover.

- "Good morning, baby. How are you feeling?" Taylor said giving you the usual forehead kiss.

You just smiled lightly and laid the table still looking to the floor to help your mom and sister with the breakfast. You sat down and stared at your breakfast for 10 minutes: cheese and ham sandwich, an apple and Taylor's hot chocolate. Your sister and mother stared sadly at you while slowly eating their breakfast. Their hearts broke by watching you sitting down and staring at the food battling against all the voices in your head. Taylor held your hand and squeezed it to show some support but said nothing. You lifted your gaze and without pronouncing a single word Taylor's face told you to start eating. You grabbed your sandwich with a napkin and raised it closer to the height of your face but made no movement with your mouth. After another minute you moved it closer to your lips and slowly opened your mouth, but quickly put it down onto the plate again. You freed your hand from Taylor's and carefully took a piece of your sandwich and started to cut it into smaller pieces with your fingers, after that you meticulously separated the bread from the ham and the cheese. Then reached for Taylor's hand again, took one of the cheese pieces and gradually moved your hand towards your mouth to eat it.

It was a devastating scene. Andrea's eyes filled with tears, but she swallowed them back. Taylor just kept staring at you until you finished the piece you had torn apart. When you were about to take another piece to do the same, she spoke up and stopped you:

- "Lizzie, baby. You know that's disordered behavior"

- "Yeah. Right" you replied sadly and grabbed to whole sandwich to take a tiny bite. It took you another hour to finish the sandwich, you said you were too full to have the other stuff, but your mom encouraged you to eat the rest. You were able to eat half the apple but then gave up.

- "Okay, Liz. It's time: go get ready" your mom said, and you stood up quietly and went upstairs to your bedroom.

Taylor followed you and sat on your bed. By now, it was usual for her to do that, she was making sure you didn't throw up or exercised. You showered quickly and opened the bathroom door to step outside of the bathroom into your bedroom and get dressed. As soon as Taylor saw you, she prepared to leave you alone and shower herself, but you turned to her and said:

- "Wait, Tay. I'm scared".

Taylor turned and looked at you standing in your underwear. Your ribs sticking out, your sunken in stomach. She was able to see almost every bone in your body. She tried to not give her sadness and concern away, but her eyes started to betray her, and you quickly grabbed a towel to cover up.

- "What are you scared of baby?" Taylor said gulping.

- "What if my clothes stop fitting like they used to when I come back? What if I don't longer fit into my clothes?"

- "Some will probably fit differently, but that's okay. You'll be healthier and happy, trust me. We'll get new clothes. I'll take you shopping" Taylor claimed.

- "I just don't see it, Tay. I don't see that my body is as unhealthy as all you say it is" you said.

- "I know. That's your body dysmorphia. You need to trust the doctors, trust us" she said.