Castles crumbling (Taylor Swift's little sister)

Chapter 9

The following days were hard for you. The conversation with your mom happened on Friday night, so that meant you missed school on Thursday and Friday, and it was driving you crazy. Your mom tried her best to support you at meals without pushing too hard on you. She also tried to get you to do stuff you liked that didn't have anything to do with exercising, so she bought a huge puzzle for both of you to put together, even though she didn't enjoy it all. You didn't speak much unless she spoke first, you were consumed by your thoughts all the time.

On Sunday evening you were puzzling together when she told you that on Monday you were going to school. She expected you to be more excited about it, since being home for the final days of the last week was hard for you, but to her surprise you just thanked her, looked for your uniform in your closet to get it prepared for the next day and got back to your puzzle.

- "There's something else..." Your mom said "you will go to school, but I'm driving you after taking you to an appointment I made in a specialized center for eating disorders recovery..."

You turned to your mother, she could tell you were panicking, but you didn't say anything. You just fought the urge to cry and continued puzzling.

Andrea called Taylor right after:

- "She's so depressed Tay. I don't know what to do. She's not talking, not even fighting back. She's having a hard time eating but ends up eating almost everything I give her. Has she talked to you?"

- "Not much. I've called her every night since I left, I'm texting her a couple times a day too, but just as you said, she's not talking much" Taylor answered.

- "She has an appointment tomorrow morning at an eating disorder treatment center, then I'm dropping her at school".

- "Tell me how it goes."

- "I will, have a good night, Darling. Love you"

- "Love you too, mom."

Even though you did your best to avoid showing any emotion when your mom told you about the appointment, panic was rapidly building. Your mind was racing with all kind of thoughts: "What if they tell me I'm too fat to have an eating disorder?", "What if they say I don't even have an eating disorder?", "What if I'm just faking everything?", "I could stop if I wanted to", "But if that was true, then I would've already stopped", "I should've stayed quiet", "Why the hell did I open my mouth in the first place", "I should've been more careful around Taylor".
You quickly picked up your phone and texted Taylor:

- "Hey Tay, are you up? I need to talk to someone."

A second after sending the message you regretted it. Fortunately, you were on time to delete it before Taylor saw it, so you did. But to your surprise, immediately after deleting it, your phone started ringing. It was Taylor. You picked up, trying your best to appear calm:

- "Hey Tay, what's up?".

- "Why did you delete the text?".

You gulped.

- "Let me rephrase that: I'm guessing that you deleted the text because you regretted it. Now, I'm up, and I'm here to listen to you. What's going on baby?".

You decided to be honest with her: - "Mom told me she scheduled an appointment at an eating disorder center tomorrow morning, and I'm scared, Tay".

- "What are you scared about, Liz? Tell me everything that's going on in that mind of yours."

- "I don't know. Forget about it Tay, I'm sorry. It's like 3am in the morning right now in London, you should be sleeping, not talking with me".

- "Baby, it doesn't matter what time it is. I'm always available for you. Besides, there's this thing called Jet lag...ha-ha". Taylor chucked - "What are you scared of?".

- "I really don't know Tay. Let's talk about something else. You were there to present some awards, right? What are you still doing in London?" You asked.

Taylor decided to not push you anymore, it was a big step for you to ask for help, to reach her when you were struggling, to open up a little bit. She opted for trying to talk about something else, she wanted to make you laugh and distract you a bit from your thoughts.

- "Yeah, I came to present some awards. But then Tree came up with the idea to record the clip for my upcoming single here in London. It's been crazy, I'm sure you'll love it. We will be rehearsing the choreography with the dancers that will appear on the video for a couple of days before actually setting up everything and recording it."

- "Sounds fun! I'm looking forward to being the first to see the clip" you said.

- "Of course. Actually, I'm sending you right now a video of me trying to learn some moves for one of the dances". Taylor said giggling.

It was a video of Taylor doing her best to get right the moves but getting frustrated and falling to the ground in the end. It was hilarious. You were laughing hard. Taylor was glad she made you laugh.

- "What do you say? I think I need a bit more of practice, but I'm about to get it right" Taylor said chuckling.

- "Yeah...you know I'm not good at dancing Tay, but I'd say that you need more than a bit of practice" you said laughing. "Thank you, Tay, you always know how to make me feel better".

- "That's what I'm here for. Even if making you feel better includes letting you make fun of me. I love you so much, baby".

- "I love you too. I'm going to sleep now" you said yawning.

- "Okay Liz, I'll probably be busy at practices tomorrow, but I'll stay by the phone. I'm thinking of you. Bye baby, remember I'm proud of you".

You hung up and tried your best to sleep off all your feelings.