Author Games: The Last Cannon

TASK SEVEN: Male Entries

District 1 Male - CASIMIR LYONS

We are told from a young age that love isn't what makes us happy. Other districts might differ but in One, our happiness is shown through our motivation to win, to become rich and to fight. Not to love or feel emotion. I went through life knowing that one day I would be tested by the rules followed by District One. That I'd need to complete the five steps set so strictly by our parents, our mentor but most of all, the academy.

I've followed them exactly for so many years;

Number one, never be unarmed.

Number two, never under any cost show vulnerability.

Number three, never lower your guard.

Number four, never allow emotion to cloud judgement.

Number five, win.

I thought the rules were simple to follow through life yet, as I find myself in the arena, I feel that I've somehow broken the rules. I stare towards the starry sky trying to forget the moments that I laid next to Cosmo unarmed, fulfilled with emotion and the worst possible thing imaginable, in love. I try to forget the moments where I have strayed from the path but as the games slowly but surely break into my head, I begin to doubt whether I can still abide by them. Maybe the love I hold for her is the motivation I need to win?

At this stage I don't know.

I stare around our camp sight to surprisingly find Castiel lying peacefully beside the crackling fire. Since losing my memories of our childhood I can't help by feel the guilt loom over head, clouding even the easiest of judgements. What would father think? Or Huxley? What would they think about how I've become so strayed from the path that I'd sacrifice my brother to win. Whilst daydreaming I fail to see Cosmo veer around the corner and sit only inches away on the rocky floor. She notices me staring towards Castiel and for the moment where we both stay silence. Yet, as I looked at her face, I can't help but wonder if she questions the same;

How can I kill my own brother?

Time is running out and with the career pack and the other tributes starting to dwindle down, I know that it might come to it. However, with Sterling and Naerissa still hanging around the group I begin to hope for the worst. That maybe they'd kill him before I have too.

"It must be hard..." Cosmo breaks the silence. "With their only ten of us left, you might need to..."

Before she speaks another word I snap my head around to face her;

"Stop."

She senses that I'm a little shaky with the topic. She gives a half-hearted smile before gliding over towards the others that stand guard. In the moment she moves through the chilling air, it passes through her effortless curled locks and when the cold whip of air hits my face, I'm welcomed by her sweet scent. I feel almost compelled to follow her but I stay lying on the ground trying to fight against my heart. Eventually I mount to my feet, eagerly wanting to flee into the forest that by now has disappeared into the distance. I feel stranded on a never shrinking mountain with the decisions I don't want to make.

I manage to pitifully make it to the campsite although the fatigue makes me collapse at Castiel side. The conflicting feelings inside makes it near impossible to sleep especially when Castiel body is smudged against mine. He drools against my sleeve yet I don't pay any attention to it. Instead my eyes fixate on the knife glowing faintly only a mere metre or two from his curled up body. It feels like fate is tempting me; the knife that wants to kill in sight of someone who needs to. My hand reaches over to it until my fingertips grasp around the cold handle. I could do it right now in his sleep. He would never know. My hand starts to uncontrollably shake at the sight of the tip caressing the fabric of his shirt, its blade snagging a hole in the fabric. The conflicting emotion inside continues to tear me open yet I push past the worries about family or the district even.