Wherever You Go [Katy Perry Fan fiction]

Chapter Seventy Four

Three hours passed by over what seemed like a whole day. There was barely any movement between us all, just a sigh every now and again, or the switch of the leg crossed over the other. My dad sat two seats away from me, holding his head up in his hand and using every ounce of energy in him to keep his eyes open.
It had just gone midnight, meaning I had now gone a total of twenty-nine hours without a second of sleep. My eyes burned like crazy, stinging harshly every time I blinked. My body felt as though it was about to shut down at any point, as it begged me to let it sleep. I was running on an empty tank. I hadn't eaten. I was dehydrated. My body hated me right now but I couldn't bring myself to move from the seat I was sat in, just in case something happened and I wasn't there. I couldn't live with myself if it did.
I was fidgeting with my fingers in my lap when a strong smell of coffee entered my nose. I barely lifted my head to look up. Shannon hovered over me, holding a polystyrene cup out in front of me and raising her eyebrows to tell me to take it. I did, but definitely didn't have any plans to drink what was in it. The nerves and anxiousness were enough to send my stomach crazy, so I knew if I ate or drank anything right now, the likelihood would be that my body would just reject it and it would come straight back up. I just placed it between my knees, enjoying the feeling of the warmth radiate through me.
"You know I'll be checking you've drunk that, right?" Shan reminds me as she sits herself in the seat beside me. Like I really expected anything else from her. "You need to at least drink something."
"I really just don't feel like I can."
I hear a small sigh come from Shannon after I've spoken. I could feel her looking at me, noticing the way I was practically forcing my eyes open. She was wise enough to know that I was far too stubborn for her to be able to force me to do something.
"What are you thinking about?" Shan asks me, placing her slightly larger hand on top of mine and lacing our fingers together. She gives it a small squeeze. "Don't keep everything to yourself. I can see that you're struggling up here," she taps her temples with her forefinger.
"I'm thinking about what I've been thinking about for the past twenty four hours. I feel like I'm going crazy." I use the backs of my hands to rub my irritating eyes. It hurt so bad. I dropped them back into my knees as I sighed heavily. I carefully dropped my head to one side, let it fall until my cheek came into contact with the warmth of Shannon's shoulder. She shuffled herself close to me so that I was comfortable, and I managed to sink further into my seat. Shan rested her head against mine.
"I know all of this is so overwhelming. Especially for you."
I try to stop myself from crying. I had had a little sob to myself a couple of times tonight, but everyone was so inside of their own minds that it was easy to be discreet. If I let the tears fall now, Shan would feel them soak through her clothing. 
"I just can't see me getting over it if anything happens to her. I don't know what I'll do."
It goes quiet for a few seconds. Shannon doesn't say anything, I think because she knew that there was nothing she could say that would make everything better. Everybody felt the same. All those feelings we had inside - the fear, the dread, the doubt - they couldn't be taken away just by the words of someone else. Not unless those words were those of a doctor, coming to tell us that my mother had stuck to her word and come out the winner in this fight. That she was in the other room waiting for us to go in and see the life in her blue eyes. That's what we all needed to hear, and that's what we had all been praying for these past three hours.
"You'll always have me, Sammie. I know you're struggling, but please don't do it on your own." Shannon's voice is barely above a whisper. I feel the small palm of her hand come into contact with mine, and she laces our fingers together in a tight lock. "Just promise me that you'll come to me if you need anything. Anything at all. Sometimes I'm not really the best with words. I know your mom would be the first to butt in right now and tell me that I talk too much-" the pair of us breathe out light laughs in sync. I couldn't recall the amount of times my mom had said that to Shannon. An 'old soul' she called her. "-and sometimes I don't always know how to make things better. But what I can do is make a mean hot chocolate with cream and marshmallows, and supply a shoulder if you need it. I'll listen. All those thoughts and feelings in your head will drive you insane if you don't let them out, and when you're ready for that, You know where I am."
I applied slight pressure to the hand of Shannon's that was holding mine and whispered, "thank you so much, Shannon."