We're so far away from you

She made her leave (Gerard)

I have had enough I am going to find out what the hell she did.

I walked out of the bus and went towards our merch booth.

"Alexis."

"Hey baby. you came to see me."

"we need to talk."

"Okay. hey Nance can you handle things here?"

"yeah sure."

I took her by the arm and went took her to the back of our bus

"Ouch Gee you are hurting me."

"Listen to me and listen to me very carefully now."

"you are scaring me."

"Answer me honestly. Did you have anything to do with Bella leaving?"

"What?"

"Did you or did you not make Bella leave?!"

"I don't know wha-"

"Don't lie to me!"

"I did it for us."

"What?"

"I made her leave to make you realize that you and me belong forever together. I did it for us."

"You little...I can't believe you! I was happy! I was happy with her! I had finally found her!! and you sent her away! what the hell is the matter with you?!"

"I am sorry I just wanted us to be together. I do not regret doing it. Because we are happy and you love me."

"When have I ever told you I have loved you! I never have. I don't love you! I am only with you because I am lonely. I am not happy with you!"

"What?!"

"You heard me. being with you is like being with a wall. I am with you and feel nothing."

"I know you love me."

"No I don't."

"You do."

"I don't and you know what we are through. and I never want to see you again. you are fired there will be a ticket at the booth waiting for you to take you home to Minnesota."

"But wait!

"Fuck you."

she made her leave.

she was the reason I missed 5 years out of my kids life.

I was pissed but I had to calm down

what the hell did she say to her?

i walked on the bus fuming with Mikey sitting and reading something.

"whoa man whats up with you?"

"Fucking Alexis. I dumped her. She told me she made Bella leave so we can be together forever or some shit like that. Man I feel lighter since I have gotten rid of the dead weight."

"Did she tell you how she made her leave?"

"No I was too pissed to ask."

"Well i think its time you knew because I know she isn't going to tell you ever."

"Tell me what?"

"What Alexis used against her in order to make her leave."

he got up and handed me a notebook with writing all over it.

I recognized the writing.

"What is this?"

"Its Bells journal. she wrote in it everyday up to the day she left us. it explains everything. every single thing she never answered when you asked, and the reasons she had those nightmares."

"I shoudn't read it."

"Just read it. it will help."

"I-"

"Trust me."

"okay."

i went over to my bunk and layed down took a deep breath and opened her journal and read the thoughts of the woman I loved.

and I was shocked from what I discovered.