First Semester

Darius 23

A lot of people won't understand me and that's fine by me because there was one person who just got me, one person who knew me better than anyone, one person I gave my heart to and that was Jeremy Iman Bennett. He was the love of my life and even before we got together I was in love with him, he was so confident, so sexy, so perfect in my eyes that he was the main reason I went through the long process of losing weight in between my freshmen and sophomore years, because I knew he was way out of my league. But even when I went from probably a six to a ten and everybody was on my dick, Jeremy didn't treat me any different, I knew in my heart I was going to have to be the one who made the first move and when I did, it was over for both of us; I don't think anyone has ever been more in love than we were, we were each other's first and something like that you just couldn't get over......... but I fucked up I let my 'best friend' get inside my head and convince me to to do something I'll probably regret for the rest of my life, when I realized the mistake I made I was more pissed at myself than at Jeremy. I was too ashamed to face him after the incident that I couldn't look him in the eyes without hating myself, after I broke up with Jeremy I was sick literally and figuratively, I couldn't eat or sleep, I was a mess and now that he had moved on I was starting to spiral.......

"'And now I see, the man you need. When I look into the mirror I see change, and I close my eyes and wish that you could see the same.... but it's too late....." I sang along with Trey Songz because this song was exactly how I was feeling. The radio cut off and I looked my roommate Brian irritated. "Why are you touching my radio?"

"Because I'm tired of hearing this sad ass music, bruh you've been listening to this sad shyt for a week and I'm too damn dark to be emotional. Why are you so damn stuck on that nigga anyways, he's clearly moved on hell I wouldn't be surprised if he had a dick in his mouth right now." Brian said, I made a quick turn into the closest parking lot and looked at him pissed.

"Watch your fuckin mouth about Jeremy........ we boys and everything but I'll beat your ass over that one." I said dead ass serious, Brian held my gaze for about two seconds before looking away.

"I'm just fucking with you Darius chill........ but forreal you need to move on. I mean you are a soccer prodigy you can have anyone on campus if you wanted and you stuck on this one person, he can't be that damn special." Brian said and I shook my head.

"You just don't get it.... Jeremy is my heart and I can't move on because I still believe we have a chance to start over and make things right." I said seriously.

"After that show you put on in Ann Arbor, I'm almost certain he doesn't want you and as your friend I can't let you keep doing this to yourself. I'm going to find you somebody to take your mind off of Jeremy at least for a day..... who knows maybe you'll find that thing your missing." Brian said and I shrugged he wouldn't understand, I've tried to move on but I only saw Jeremy. 

"Look I'm about to head to the library, you riding or do you want me to take you back to the gym?" I asked. Brian decided to head back to the dorm, I dropped him off and got to the library and started studying. I had been here over an hour when I felt someone standing over my shoulder and when I turned around five dudes wearing purple and gold were standing behind me.

"You're Darius Campbell right?" The shortest dude said and I nodded. "Aight well come with us, we need to talk to you about something real quick." I had two options I could tell the dudes to fuck off or I could avoid a altercation and go with them, I picked the smarter choice and got up. They form a semi-circle around me and led me outside where three more dudes were waiting, I wasn't a fighter but if I had to I would because I refused to get jumped. One of the three new dudes looked familiar but I couldn't place his face and before I had a chance to figure it out the oldest of the three spoke.

"Out of respect to y'all and your school, I figured we should come to y'all with our issues before things got out of hand and as brothers we think y'all should handle this since he goes to your........ school?" The dark skinned dude said with a little bit of humor in his voice.

"Aight Big Brother Denzel, state your claim." The dude who I'm guessing is the leader said calmly.

"As many of you know my family has been Ques since they formation of our brotherhood and the next in line is my little cousin Giovanni. This....... dude thought it was a good idea to come to 'our' school and try to pick a fight with him and like I said I thought y'all should handle it since he's a student at your school." Denzel said and I started getting nervous, so Gio's punk ass sent his attack dogs to handle something that should be between us.

"We'll handle it, now have a safe trip back to Ann Arbor." The short dude said and the three dudes walked away, but not before the tallest one who now that I thought about it looked a lot like Gio gave me one last murderous look. "Ayy y'all head back to the house let me talk to him alone real quick." The rest of them left us and I stood there nervously.

"So what now you're going to try and fight me or something?" I asked preparing myself for a fight.

"Nah nothing like that, I just want to talk to you Darius. Let's go grabbed something to eat..... I'm Ezra by the way." He said and I thought about it for a second before following him to a restaurant not far from the library. We sat there quietly eating until Ezra finally spoke. "I've seen some of your soccer highlight's your pretty good better than good actually, which is one of the reasons I didn't let them hurt you....."

"Gee thanks." I said sarcastically and Ezra smirked a little.

"No problem, but another reason is because we've actually had our eyes on you since you got on campus as a potential pledge once you meet the requirements." Ezra said and I was surprised I never even gave pledging a thought but now........ "Another thing Darius you should probably stop going to Ann Arbor by yourself."

"I can't there's something........ someone there that I have to make things right with." I said quietly.

"I'm not saying you CAN'T go there, I'm just saying that you need to at least go with a group just so nothing happens to you. A couple of us are going up there for a Halloween Party and I think you should come with us, it'll give you a chance to meet some of the other Q's and see what we're about." Ezra said but I saw it as chance to potentially see Jeremy again.

"I'll think about it but I really need to get back to studying." I said standing up, Ezra nodded and walked with me back to the library. "Umm I'll let you know about the Halloween party within a couple days." I said and he smirked.

"I hope so. It was nice to officially meet you Darius." He said dapping me up and walking away. Instead of going back inside I decided to go back to my dorm, once I got back I sat in my car and scrolled through my phone looking at old pictures of my and Jeremy and felt the tears forming in my eyes. Damn I really missed him....... I went to my contacts and found a number I hadn't called in months hoping like hell she didn't change her number. 

"I must be trippin because I KNOW you didn't call my phone?" Naomi said and I suppressed a smile this girl was always trippin.

"Wassup Naomi, how is college?" I asked trying to get her to relax.

"Don't try that shyt with me Darius, I already know what you want and my answer is hell to the no. Jeremy is HAPPY and I'm not going to let you try and weasel your way back into his life. If you really love him him why can't you just let him be happy?" Naomi asked.

"It's because I love him........... look I don't wanna argue with you, I know you've always hated me but could you please, please tell Jeremy I want to talk to him." I said and Naomi was quiet for about two minutes.

"NOPE!" She said hanging up and I felt the sorrow setting in, until I got a text from her a few minutes later.

NAOMI: I'll talk to him but I can't make any promises, don't call me again Darius, I'm serious.

ME: Thanks.

After that my spirits rose a little, if there was anyone who could get Jeremy to talk to me it was her and if there was a 1% chance that he agreed to talk to me, I would take it because I wouldn't stop until I got my baby back at any cost...........................................