He loves me, he loves me not

Chapter 20

Tammy's P.O.V

Zayn and Niall left over an hour ago and Harry and I are sitting silently, intertwined, reading books.

" You know we've been talking about going to your mom's?"

Harry says breaking the silence.

"Yeah" I nod.

"Well I was wondering if we could make it week after next. " Harry says and I instantly turn and look up at him to see if he's serious.

He is.

"Yeah, sure" I smile.

"Oh and... I'm going away for 5 days starting Monday" He looks down at his book and continues reading.

"What? " I say in horror...

"I mean, where you going? " Correcting myself because of the frown that appears on his face.

"I'm helping my dad. He has this presentation in Germany." Harry says.

"Germany? "

"Yeah. "

"My dad lives in Germany" I say getting a bit excited.

"Oh yes.. I totally forgot. " Harry sees where I'm going to with this.

"Lemme call him. " I grab my phone of the table and call my father.

"Hello? " He casually answers.

"Hey Dad."

"Oh. Hi sweetie. How ya doin'? " He asks cheerfully.

"I'm good. I just wanted to know what your doing on Monday."

"Well I'm in Germany and I'm meeting with this guy,Twist I thinks the name, for some business, why?"

"One sec Dad." I move the phone away.

"Isn't your dad's-well step dad- surname Twist? " I whisper to Harry.

"Yeah why? "  I hold my finger up to silence him.

"Hey Dad. I was wondering. Could I come visit? From Monday till.. I don't know..."

"Yes of course ya can darlin'. It would great to see ya" He cheers cutting me off.

"Okay, I'll see you then"

"See ya then hon."  We both hang up.

I slide my phone onto the table again and I can feel Harry's eyes drilling holes into the back of my head.

"I think our father's are in business together. " I finally turn to him.

"Wait... so your dad is .. Gregory Ryan. I'm so stupid, I didn't make the connection. My dad is partnered with a car manufacturing company and they're wanting to build a new factory. They're thinking about hiring your father. "

"He is the best" I say proudly.

"I never even thought..." Harry is deep in thought and I carry on reading Great Expectations by Charles Dickens.

...

"Do you always mumble when you read?" Harry asks.

I hadn't noticed but I was mumbling the words as I read.

"Oh, sorry. " I blush

"No it's fine. I was just wondering" Harry comforts me.

"Yeah I do. "

"Would you like to read aloud?" What's with the questions.

"No definitely not." I shake my head furiously.

"Why? "

"Just... I get nervous and muddle up the words. " I sigh.

'You're gonna have to tell him about it sooner or later' my conscience tells me.

'Shut up!!' I yell back.

"Oh" He leaves me and keeps reading.

I try and carry on too but I feel the need to tell Harry about my... my... condition.

"I think you should know... that... I have..." I don't know how else to say it but directly. "I'm... dyslexic"

"Oh. That makes sense"

What the ....

"What makes sense?" I ask

"You do things differently. Like you're hair. You dress first then do your hair. Which makes sense but your hair was wet.

And you told me that you're bad with money that day we ordered pizza.

Telling time is also difficult for you.

And your handwriting is constantly changing.

They're all symptoms."

Harry noticed all those things about me?

"Wow! You're even more of an inspiration to me now. Your strong and beautiful, to have gone through school and succeeded like you have even with this... complicated gift."

His words scurry into my heart. They run around looking for the door where I keep all my treasured words (which are few and far between) and when they find it deep down in the dungeons of my heart they slam the door closed in the hopes of never being forgotten in they empty passages like the other ordinary meaningless words.

"Not strong enough though. I'm not even in university. I'm sorry if I sound ungrateful for your compliment, it's just I've been bullied about it all my life. Even sometimes by my parents too and I'm not used to people just accepting me" I half whisper as the heartbreaking memories flash in my head. Almost like a slideshow on rerun.

"Well, I love you just the way you are and not matter what happens we stick together, okay? " Harry slides his fingers under my chin tilting my head up to him so we're eye to eye.

"Okay."I smile. For once actually feeling loved and accepted.

"Just don't tell anybody before I'm ready" I beg.

Last thing I need is Louis finding out about this and punishing me for it.

"Promise" Harry's comforting smile reassures me and so does his tight hug and gentle kiss on my forehead.