My Only Love

Chapter 12

        Nate for the second time around went to Kate's place hoping this time she would finally be home. But again she wasn't not even having the conscience to tell him. He felt hurt and taken for granted like someone discarded not even caring how he felt. She was again with her Richie Rich who seem to be fetching her almost every day. Even taking her out every night to expensive dinners. One he knew that Richie Rich could afford no matter the price. It was only sympathy he got from Kate's mother who tried to her best to make him feel better but he was beyond consolation. He was hurting and feeling sorry for himself. He saw pity in Kate' s mother's eyes unable to control her daughter who seemed swept of her feet by the rich guy. And where was he in all this some discarded trash? He wasn't even afforded a phone call or text from Kate. It sickened Nate feeling even more hurt at the thought.

Nate arrived at his apartment tired and in a foul mood. Kate's behavior uncalled for. He was mad at her mixed with jealousy that was boiling up inside him. How he got through his classes he didn't know but his emotions were in a complete turmoil mixed with raw hurt and anger at her insensitivity.

His mobile phone was ringing. It was Kate. He allowed it to ring not even wanting to answer it. How infuriated he was with her she could never imagine.

Kate felt agitated she knew Nate heard his phone but he was not answering. How mad he was with her was beyond her. He had visited her twice and still she was off with Ryan. She just took the easy way out not even texting or calling him that she wasn't home. Kate knew she had no excuse being insensitive and being awful to Nate who didn't deserve such treatment. She could have at least informed Nate no matter his reaction would be. Instead she chose not to do anything hurting him further. Please answer me Nate. Please she pleaded as it rang for the 12th time. But she still waited hoping. She breathed a sigh of relief as she heard a muffled Hello, more like a grunt from him obvious enough that he was forced to answer.

Nate I know you're mad at me. she continued. There was silence. Nate wasn't saying a word but Kate knew he was there.

Nate I know you're there. Please hear me out. she continued pleading with him.

But still that silence on the other end of the line. He still wasn't responding. Kate could see how mad he was at her. Kate's pleading tone touched Nate but he was in a real foul mood all he wanted to do was be silent.

Please Nate. Please talk to me. Let me explain. Please. Kate begged again feeling her voice starting to get shaky.

Finally Nate's voice came but it was cold and unfeeling so unlike him that Kate realized the damaged she had caused how he took Nate for granted.

What do you want Kate? he demanded. Oh and let me add what do I have the honor of hearing your voice. He was being sarcastic but Kate let it pass. She was the one at fault here so she had to pacify Nate. She absolutely knew he came to visit her everyday and yet she took the easy way out not giving him the decency of informing him.

Nate I know you're mad. I'm sorry I know I should have called or texted you. It had just slipped my mind. I figured you would have checked with me first before you came over. I'm so sorry Nate I didn't mean to be so insensitive.

Slipped your mind Kate! Are you that forgetful? Don't give me that crap Kate. You knew I come everyday and what did you do! Nothing! Not even having the guts to tell me that you were out with your Richie Rich. You've got hands you could have called or texted me. Can't you at least afford me that? Or maybe you're so gung ho over that Richie Rich and you forget about everything else.

Kate felt humiliated with Nate's words feeling very guilty. She also noticed how angry Nate was with her his voice hard.

I forgot. Please forgive me Nate. I'm sorry really. How could I be so insensitive.she said softly trying her darn best to quell his temper.

I went twice. Your mom didn't even know what to say. You make me look so stupid! You treated me like shit Kate! His voice was filled with hurt and anger.

Nate I said I was sorry please don't be like this. It won't happen again I promise you. Please understand. she said repeatedly apologizing again.

Understand Kate? How immature you acted. What am I a saint? Nate was still being irrational and was livid with anger. Kate's pleading tone unheeded.

For Nate her apologies were useless. She just chose not to inform him that was as plain as day. He just felt like shit being treated badly. Her feeble excuses were like crap to Nate. Some part of him felt he was overdoing things had to control his temper but he just got fed up being treated like trash.

Kate felt her apologies did not matter to Nate at all. He was beyond reason now and some part of her was starting to get angry at his reaction.

And who asked you to come Nate? Did I ask you? Did I? And you kept coming and coming. Everyday. Suffocating! She was heated up in anger herself. She didn't care anymore if she hurt him. She had already humbled herself and apologized so many times but to no avail he was being stubborn and had a one track mind.

There was a long silence after that. So long. Kate didn't know what to do wanting to berate herself for having to say such words to Nate. She wished she could take them all back. Kate knew he didn't deserve those words. Kate enjoyed Nate's visits looking forward to every one of them at the end of the day. But now the harm was done. She had hurt him terribly she knew.

Nate felt as if he had been slapped by Kate. Her words cut through him. The pain so great he felt a huge weight on his chest. After still a very long silence he found his voice barely audible.

I'm sorry I've suffocated you with my visits Kate. Don't worry you won't have to bear with me anymore. That's the last of my visits. he said quietly.

Hearing Nate's words Kate felt a finality to it. It scared Kate hearing his quiet words but filled with hurt. She didn't mean to hurt him she was just angry herself. What could she do to repair the damaged she caused.

But he didn't seem to hear her. It's okay Kate thanks for being frank with me. At least now I know. His voice was shaky Nate's hurt evident. He didn't deserve any of it Kate knew.

Nate please. She begged. I take back those words I don't mean them at all. she said almost crying in frustration at their exchange. It seems you always hurt the ones you care about.

All Kate heard was Nate hanging up on her. His obvious pain echoing in her mind. If she could only take back all those words. Suffocated how could she have uttered such a thing. She always found joy in Nate's visits. Yet the harm was done. Will she ever see Nate again? It seems there was a finality to his words. All she could do was cry as tears streamed down her face.

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