Our Apartment In Seoul || Jikook

사십오[45]

[No proofread]

There was confidence filling up my body as I walked straight and with decisively steps into the building.

For the first time it felt like my heart knows what it really wants.

It wants Jimin.

Who could ever know that I'll fall that deep for a person? And that it will feel this good? That I changed everything just to love this one person?

But the weirdest thing was that I felt no regrets for this. That I felt happier than ever before.

I felt like someone gave me wings to catch after my dreams.

"It was the feeling of being in love that made me feel like this. And the glimpse of hope that gave me the impetus to fly..."

Again, it was Jimin whom my heart really desires.

And after all of this questioning and asking, I finally knew what I was really feeling. What Namjoon, Seokjin and Hoseok meant with all of their speeches about love. Now it was all clear to me.

And now my wings were only waiting to be spread out and carry me to my destination.

It was the evening before Christmas and the company was even then filled with lots of people, most of them trainees.

I craned my neck to look around for my destination, but there were too many people. Only frazzles of clothes and dark colored hair roamed around the hall. No orange haired head that poked out of the crowd.

But that didn't discourage me. No, it was the opposite, it made me even more encouraged to find him. And I couldn't deny, but my heart pounded faster at the thought of confessing to someone for the very first time in my life.

I got ripped out of my thoughts as someone's shoulder collided with mine.

I staggered a bit back and was about to mumble a short excuse when my gaze met the one of the other person. And even if it wasn't Jimin, I felt still relieved and happy as I recognized him.

Hyung. I said and looked half smiling at Hoseok, my breath becoming a bit lighter. Because now was the first chance to make up for what my old self had messed up.

It was a chance to be a good friend.

What? Are you here to spread your cockiness or what? Hoseok said with an unamused expression.

Hyung, I want to talk. I replied, still with the same imperturbable determination in my voice.

I have no time for you and your insults, Jungkook. Go out of my way. He just spoke unimpressed and tried to shove me out of his line, but I stayed as steadfast as a mountain. This time I wouldn't give up so easily.

Hoseok stopped and crossed his arms in front of his chest, giving me that eyebrow-look. Aish, what do you want? He asked with a groan.

I want reconciliation.

Hoseok snorted out of mockery, but stopped as I didn't move a single eyelid. He eyed me suspiciously up and I could see that he searched for the lie in my words.

But I also knew that he couldn't find anything of this. Because I said the truth.

Hoseok-hyung. I started. I made a lot of mistakes, I know this. I've been a dumb, insulting, arrogant, obnoxious, terrifying, awful and disgusting asshole for the last years. But now... I don't want to be like this anymore. I don't want suppress the disgust I felt for myself under ignorance and obnoxiousness. I don't want to feel guilty anymore. I told him with as much seriousness stressed in my voice as possible. I'm sorry for everything.