Zosia stirred in her sleep and began to wake up. Her neck was sore. Those hospital chairs aren't too comfy. "Ollie" she noticed her boyfriend and smiled. "Your dad texted me." He smiled at his girlfriend. "What time is it?" A sleepy Zosia asked. "About half five." Ollie answered after looking at his phone. "How's Natalia?" He asked looking at the sleeping teenager. "Upset- obviously. But she's resilient. She'll cope!" Zosia smiled down at her little cousin. "We'll have to get her up soon for day treatment!" Ollie mused. "What after everything?" Zosia asked "shouldn't we give her a day off." "Zosh, she's only been there one day! She needs their support more than ever. She can go to DT us to work then back here this evening." Ollie looked at Zosia.
They decided to wake Natalia at 6.30 "Natalia, wake up kochaine." Zosia put her hand lovingly on her cousins shoulder. Ali began to wake up. "How's mama?" Ali looked at her mother. "Shes the same as last night. Her neurologist is coming in 15 minutes and will update us." Ollie replied. "I need the toilet" Ali declared and grabbed her bag. "Left down the corridor through the double doors second on the right." Zosia told her. Ten minutes later Ali hadn't returned from the toilet. "I'll go and check she's ok." Zosia decided. "Natalia, are you ok kochaine?" Zosia knocked on the only locked door in the toilets. "Fine" Ali faltered. "Kochanie, You don't sound fine. Open the door." There was no answer "please" still no answer "Natalia, come on." Zosia coaxed. Ali slipped the craft knife back into her pencil case where it lived and opened the door smiling through the tears. "Hey" Zosia embraced her cousin. She saw Ali wince. "Show me your thighs!" She demanded. "No!" Ali argued. "Now Natalia or I'm taking you to the ED!" Ali saw that there was nobody else around and lowered the top of her trousers. There were about 10 deep cuts horizontally the first on her hip. The last a quarter of the way down her thighs. "Oh Ali" Zosia sighed tears in her eyes. "Zoshie, I'm so sorry! Please don't cry! Honestly!" Ali had tears in her eyes too. Zosia took a deep breath to compose herself. "They don't need stitches I don't think. Possibly a few steri-strips. You go back to your mamas room. I'll be there in a minute." Zosia looked at Ali as she left. And this too shall pass. And this too shall pass. And. This. Too. Shall. Pass. She left the loos and went to the nurses station. "I'm a doctor, Holby city, my cousin is hurt can I have some steristrips?" "We'll book her in as a patient!" The nurse answered. "Please don't. Self harm. I think she may refuse treatment." Zosia pleaded. The nurse looked at her sceptically and sighed. "You're Mr Selfs daughter, aren't you" "Yes" "Well its early morning and there's not many doctors around. I'll treat her without booking her in. You can be there. I won't tell if you won't." "Thank you." Zosia smiled
"Last one" the young nurse said as she applied a steri-strip to the last of Ali's cuts. "Well done sweetie." The nurse started to dress Ali's cuts. Ali turned to Zosia and asked her in Polish "jesteś zły?" Are You angry. "Sorry?" The nurse asked. "Sorry, that was Polish. I was asking Zosia something." Ali replied and the nurse nodded. "No" Zosia replied in Polish "Disappointed?" Ali continued in Polish "Nie" no Zosia replied "Upset?" "Natalia stop. Please. I'm not angry, not disappointed not upset. I'm just tired." Zosia said more sternly than intended. "Sorry Kochanie. I'll be back in a minute." Zosia left the treatment room straight into Ollie's arms. "Hey, hey, it's ok." Ollie whispered into Zosia's hair. "It's ok." Tears were streaming down her face. Ollie spotted a relatives room and guided Zosia inside. She sat down on the sofa. Her knees drawn up to her chest in an almost foetal position. "Zosh?" Ollie asked. "She cut herself." Zosia sobbed. "She could have talked to us but she cut herself. Why, why would she do that! She's so young and fragile. I thought we could help her but we can't. She didn't even tell me Ricky was hurting her." "Zosia, these things take time, she's only been with us a few months. You told me. When you felt depressed...and when I did too. We just wanted someone to be there and someone to care. Even though we would never admit it when we were ill. We are there for Nat and that's all we can do. Are you okay Zosh?" Ollie looked at Zosia. "Yes!" "Zosh? I know you're not!" "It's just hard to see someone who you love. Hate themselves so much. I just feel so...niepotrzebny...useless." She stayed quiet for a moment. "Mama would know what to do" Ollie pulled Zosia close. "I miss her so much. Especially since Natalia is here and she's not. It's just hard." "Hey, I know. I know" Ollie comforted Zosia. He kissed her. Zosia went to the toilets and splashed cold water on her face and washed off the mascara running down her face. She then went into the treatment where the nurse had just finished bandaging Ali's leg. They thanked the nurse and went back to Klaudia's room. As soon as they sat down Guy came in as well as Klaudia's consultant Mr Phelps. "Shes in a coma. We're hoping that it will allow some of the swelling in her brain to go down. Now you're aware that it is likely that Klaudia will have some sort of lasting damage." They all nodded. "These can include mood changes and changes in personality, memory or concentration problems. Seizures, speech problems and limb weakness." Mr Phelps included. "We can't give much of a prognosis until Klaudia is conscious. Her condition is critical but stable. "Thank you." Ollie replied. Mr Phelps left but Guy stayed. "What's your plan for today?" Guy asked. "We need to get back to Holby. We have work and Ali needs to be home too" Zosia replied not wanting to explain eating disorder treatments to her father. "We'll come back this evening." Ollie looked at Guy. "We'll all keep our phones on us, and you know the numbers for AAU and Darwin. Ring us if anything. And i mean anything changes." Ollie demanded. "Of course." Guy replied. Zosia kissed Klaudia's forehead and Ali did the same. They went to leave. "Wait!" Ali said. She pulled open her bag pulled out a notebook ripped out a page and wrote
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Mama, I'm sorry, I love you. Natalia xxx. "I want her to know that I was here. If she wakes up today." Ali put the paper on her mums bedside table. Then picked it up again and added her mobile number. "Lets go. " Ollie pulled Ali close as then left the room woke Zosia squeezed her cousins hand.
