Jiley-Our Realitionship Together

Insecure feeling

James POV:
Riley is pregnant again! Im so happy. I roll over on the bed and smile at her as she sleeps. I cup her cheek and stroke it gently. Her eyes flutter open and she smiles at me.
'Goodmorning princess'
'Morning Ja'
I smile at her. She softly kisses me.
I look down at her neck and see her still wearing the locket I gave her last night.
'It looks cute on you'
She smiles.
'Soon that second picture will be in there' she smiles.
Her smile quickly fades.
'Whats wrong?'
'Its just...Im scared that Im going to loose it again'
'Baby you wont'
'I just dont want to dissapoint you again'
'Youve never dissapointed me' I say proping myself up on my elbo.
'But if I loose it...'
'Which you wont. Now dont start putting that kind of stuff into your mind. You have no reason to loose it this time. Im going to be here for you all the way okay?'
She nods.
'Thank you'
I lean in and kiss her.
'Lets go and get breakfast'
She nods and gets up. We get dressed and go downstairs to the kitchen. Emily is hanging around.
'Morning Jiley'
'Yo'
'Hey'
I get out some cereal.
'What do you want Ri?'
I turn around and see that shes gone pale. She rushes to the bathroom. I follow her in and hold back her hair while she throws up in the toilet. She rinces out her mouth.
'Stupid morning sickness'
'Its all part of it Ri'
She smiles.
We walk back into the kitchen.
'You feeling better sis?'
'Yeah'
We sit down.
'Im happy for you guyes. Youve been through so much and you deserve this baby'
We smile at her.
'Thanks Em'
'Morning Torjmans and Raymond' Kevin says walking in.
'Hey Kev'
Emily and Kevin look at eachother and smile. Things thankfully havent been akward between them since Kevin found out that she was engaged. Hes really happy for her and is willing to help out anytime. Charlie knows about their romantic history and hes cool with it.
'So. You doing anything much today Em?' Kevin asks.
'Probaly just hang with Charlie or something'
He nods.
'Happy Christmas everyone!' mom says walkimg into the kitchen.
'Happy christmas!' we smile back hugging her.
She looks at Riley.
'Riley deer. You should get some rest. Or at leaat eat something proper'
Riley smiles at her.
'Mom. Shes fine' I smile.
'Suit yourself! When I was having you your father was telling me to rest and eat proper! Thank god I did! Or else I wouldnt have my adorable son!'
She walks off.
'I knew she prefered you to me' Kevin smiles leaving the room.
'I cant dissagree with you there Kev!' Emily says following him.
Riley looks at me.
'Youve always been her favourite'
I smile and kiss her.
I watch as mom sits down in the sitting room.
'You okay?'
'Yeah. Im just worried about her'
'Why?'
'Shes reaching her old age Ri. What if she cant be around to see the baby? It will break her heart'
'Then we're going to do what ever we can to make sure she sees it'
I nod.
'I love you'
'I love you too'
Piper walks in.
'Happy Christmas' she says sleeply.
'Someones tired' I smile.
She sits next to us.
'I sometimes wish I wasnt your cousin'
'Why?'
'Because I wish I was your sister instead'
I smile.
'You are'
'But not really'
'Whats brought this on?'
'Its just you have a brother and Riley has a sister and me...well I have neither'
'Thats not true. You know Ive always thought of you as my sister'
'I know'
'Then lets keep it like that okay?'
She nods and hugs me.
'Congradulations on the baby by the way'
'Thanks' I smile.
She walks off.
Riley places her hand on my shoulder and rests her head on her hand.
'Shes so sweet'
I nod.
'Yeah she is'
We eat some breakfast and sit down in the sittingroom with everyone else.
'So Em. Whens the wedding?' Riley asks.
'Febuary 19th'
'Awsome'
We stay in silence.
'Can someone come outside and build a snowman with me?' Piper asks.
'Ill come!'
'Me too!'
'And me!'
Emily, Charlie and Kevin go outside with her.
Riley looks at me.
'Ill be three months pregnant then'
'When?'
'For Ems wedding'
'Is that good or bad?'
'I dont know. Ill be showing a bit then which means my dress will look terrible on me. Ill be ugly'
My eyes widden.
'Dont say that! You wont be ugly. Youll be beautiful. Just like you always are'
'No I wont'
'Riley. Thats what been pregnant is! Your carring a baby inside you! But its our baby. And nothing can change that. Your the most beautiful person Ive ever met. Your not ugly'
'Your only saying that cause you have to'
'No Im not. I mean it Ri. Your beautiful inside and out'
'I hate been pregnant'
I sigh.
Her confidance must have really dropped after the misscarrige. She never had these thoughts last time. I just dont know what to say to her.
Mom sits down next to us.
'Whats this I hear about you hating been pregnant?'
'I just feel so insecure and I dont know why'
'Mmm. Theres only one person who can talk to you about it and thats your mom. I could too but we're all different. I think its time for a little motherly love'
She nods.
Her mom comes over and sits down.
'Come on son. Lets give them some time'
I nod. I kiss Rileys head.
'Its going to be okay'
I then walk off.
I just hope her mom can get through to her.
Rileys POV:
'So why are you feeling uncomfortable sweetie?' mom asks.
'I dont know. I mean I want this baby I just feel strange about it'
She nods.
'I think I know why'
'Why?'
'Your confidance took a drop after your misscarrige. You feel like you cant take care of it. You feel like of you do something wrong youll loose it again and upset James'
I nod.
'Thats excatly what I was thinking'
'The only way you can get through this is to think positivly. Stop thinking about the bad things that could happen and think about the good instead. Think about what your going to do with the baby. Think about names for it. Stuff like that. Now that little baby inside there needs its mom to stay strong and give it what it needs. It needs love and care and only you can give it that. Its not mine or anyone elses child. Its your and James. And its the most important thing to you. Now dont make James regret doing a bunch of backflips yesterday for you to just give up now. Hes going to be here for you all the way. All you have to do is take care of your body till that baby arrives in nine months time. What do you say? You ready for this?'
I smile.
'Yeah'
'Good'
I hug her.
'Thanks mom'
'Thats what Im here for'
She gets up and walks off. James comes over and sits down.
'Well? How did it go?'
'Really good. I guess my confidence level had just droped after the misscarige and I kept thinking about the things that could go wrong instead of the good things that could happen'
He smiles.
'So no more negative thoughts?'
'None'
He smiles and I stretch out on the coutch with my head resting against him.
He places his hand on my stomach. I smile as he makes little circles. I know hes going to make an amazimg father and I cant wait for this baby to come!