Weeb's Diary

Konfusion

7/7/18

I know your wondering why my spelling of Confusion is with a 'K' 

it resembles him, Kuro, Also the song above is what i feel about this whole thing and i couldn't find a better song to describe it

For a whole year, i've never been confused in my entire life because of one guy and that's him. Hell, if someone put him and a math problem side by side, i'd be more confused and unable to solve him. 

I know all of you are wondering, what the hell is Shiro on about ? Well my dear reader, for the whole year i had fallen in love with a man named Kuro, i've been confused

confused if all these unusual things he's doing is just what he does with every one or that he's just messing with me or maybe. . .just maybe. . .he's serious, he just doesn't know how to show it properly 

i even asked his brother about what he's like but i didn't get much of an answer that im looking for, im afraid to ask Kuro, himself, that question but with asking comes the possibility that it might ruin our friendship that we already have and i don't want that to go away. 

I did however asked him but it's like short and uhh not much explained and his only reply is "im like that to everyone" but alot of people, including some of our close friends (we have the same group of friends) said that he likes me, even Kuro's crush, monika, who is convinced that he likes me. 

i don't wanna jinx it nor get my hopes up, im being cautious about this, it's like the story of the moth and the fire, get to close and you might get hurt. Im keeping distances but at the same time putting up barriers, limiting my expectations and hopes as to not get hurt so much 

for the first time in my entire life, i became cautious, not presumptuous, not always jumping to conclusions, analyzing every detail, lowering my hopes, lowering my expectations and staying alert. NEVER have i done that and i bet toni would agree (IF YUR EVER READING THIS, YA KNOW U AGREE WITH THIS BRUH).

Usually i would jump right in, assume, be a stupid girl, hoping that the guy would love him back but now IT'S SO DIFFERENT

maybe that's why im in love with Kuro, he brings out the side of me which i don't normally show and make me do the things i've never done before in my life.

I give huge credit to Toni, Kuro and maybe a bit of help from Aria (@1011eirene)  , for helping me to become strong and atleast overcome this problem i have (not the one above but the WHOLE ENCHILADA OF A PROBLEM), step by step, they help me through it all 

and i couldn't thank them enough, I LOVE THEM SOOOO MUUUCCHHH, 
(even though i wanna show my appreciation, toni became a bit of a bitch but meh, i'll keep calm )

ANYWAYSS, THAS ALL Y'ALL

SHIRO OUT !